Thinking Of You

Lying in my bed,

Hugging tightly my pillow,

Pillow that I wish was you

Can’t stop thinking of you

You made me crazier for you

 

Sitting in the couch while watching TV,

Watching your favorite show,

Thinking that it is you I’m watching at,

Watching you doing your thing,

Thing that I love most in you, you make me happy

 

Standing while looking at our picture,

Picture that I framed,

Framed with love of you,

Love of you that made me thinking of you,

Thinking of you always.

Reviews

[trishalvarma]

Hey, returning the favor =D

I love "pillow that I wish was you", I believe many people can find themselves in a position where they miss someone a lot.

"Standing while looking at your picture" should be changed to: standing while looking at our picture. ~ That way it will give a thought to the reader that both subject were together. Also it depicts the scenario that the subject is standing at and art gallery looking at the picture.

[Jazique]

We'll nicely done. As long as stay in your heart mind they always their in that frame picture that you have.

[Brad]

this reminds of a long distance relationship...one that i had once...and i made the mistake when i saw her of making love...it only made things worse then better...

[Zackery Alan Daley]

This reminds me of...well, me. Very good punctiation as well as a loosened rhyming scheme that flowed with antuiquity and ease. It is strict speaking about the five lines per stanza but you do not notice it because of the flow and intensity. Sounds like teenage hormones to me, which is a horrifying state of mind that I believe signals signs of change until you are 23. Reminds me of my broken heart from a Mormon bishop's daughter, and how all the nights alone left me in my own head...broken and dead. lol that kind of rhymed, again though very, very good job send me another read request!

[Matthew Kult]

Hello Zack,

I been here. Although you walk the line of love and longing, this can turn into an ugly scenerio of obsession and desire. Something I know well. When I want something I must have it, I will do anything to get it. Destroy anything in my way.
Excellent

Regards,

Matthew

[B MacGregor]

Honorably deserving. Everyone should be so deserving.

[Amy Bumpas]

In this line:Thinking that it is you I’m watching at
(it may read better if you said "looking" at
In this line:Love of you that made me thinking of you
(I think you should rearrange your words differently)
If you read it a loud, you will see what I mean.

This is a very thoughtful poem:)

[Broken Girl]

Very sweet!

[Shiela]

lovely work....

[Ruth]

The yearning within this is wonderful :)
A great poem hon, shows the nostalgia well and the heart's wishes:)
xx

[The Water Queen]

This was very good. Great job!