Unbalanced

When nothing makes sense

Panic! there is nothing but panic coursing through my veins.

Freezing me in place, as I sit here motionlessly, 

The room is spinning around me every so slowly.

Panic! there is nothing but panic as I go crazed.

Manic! maybe I'm becoming manic.

The voices in my head are not okay!

Getting louder by the second,

 Louder by the day.

But on the outside, I appear okay.

Laugh.. smile.. nod and wave.

Is there anyone out there who can read my face?

See the panic in my eyes,

Hear the shake in my voice.

Tears streaming down my face.

How about the fear screaming on my face.

That everything is really not okay.

it's never enough, to little to late.

Perfect! why can't you be perfect?

How can you live your life, day by day, 

Time is quickly slipping away.

The voices in my head are going insane.

Multiplying fast, inside and out.

No matter where I turn there is no escape.

"Do this" "Do that", "Try this", "Look at that",

You're never enough, these things take time.

 Your fight, your decision, you didn't have to listen.

This is your life, to do what you want, but.....

Listen to me, just do as I say.

Let me go ahead and pull the strings.

Contradicting, confusing,.. all over the place.

The longer you take.

 The more time you waste.

The burden you become.

Simply a waste of space. 

Someone give me the playbook.

Cut to the chase.

 I’m begging you, just tell me what to do.

Read my fate. 

Send me a sign.

I just don’t want to make a mistake,

Can’t turn back the clock,

Only get one shot.

Don’t know what to do?

What’s right or wrong?

How do I fight these monsters in my head?

When they keep appearing again and again.

Never ending, exhausting, and disheartening 

My code is glitching, prepare shutdown.

3..2…1…