Chapter 11

I sat on the bed where Cole had left me hours before still thinking about the events that had just passed. My dad would never hurt a fly, let alone kill a mother of three kids. Sure, it probably wasn't his intention, but still, it felt so wrong and I somehow felt guilty.

I knew how bad it was to go through the loss of a mother. It's horrible. It feels like a huge piece of you has been ripped out. I could only imagine the pain her kids had to go through. I sighed and stared blankly at the top of the four-poster bed.

Then my mind flashed to Cameron. I wonder what he looked like. I also wonder if he was as cocky and arrogant as Cole, or maybe sweet yet mysterious like Jax. God. Why have I been studying these a******s personalities. Why would Cameron leave his brothers and father to go through this alone?

I was snapped out of my thoughts whenever the door opened and Jax's head peaked in. I felt my breath catch in my throat whenever I saw those big ice blue orbs stare into my plain brown ones.

“Hi,” he said sheepishly

“Hello.” I replied short, and fast, making an attempt to sound completely uninterested

“So, um.” he scratched the nape of his neck nervously “I heard you had an encounter with our father.”

I scoffed and rolled my eyes, “It wasn't an 'encounter'” I emphasized on the word encounter “More like held against my will while he threatened me.”

He gave me a sympathetic look before sitting down on the bed, causing my knee to brush against the side of his thigh. I quickly moved my leg back, not liking the electricity feeling that shot through my leg at the little ounce of contact.

He must have noticed my uncomfortableness because his body tensed when I moved away, “Yeah,” he let out a small nervous laugh “Guess you know where Cole got it from.”

“No s**t, Sherlock.” I mumbled under my breath

“I heard that,” he shot me an accusing, yet amused glance

“Sorry.” I said quickly, looking down at my hands in my lap and fiddling with them nervously.

“You don't have to apologize.” he assured me, cracking a small smile.

“Oh, sorry.” I said again, lifting my head “Sorry!” I apologized a third time after realizing my mistake “I'm so- never mind, I'll shut up now.”

And with that, I went back to messing with my hands.

He laughed at my actions and shook his head, his body tensing down again.

Without thinking I opened my mouth, “Why'd your brother leave?” I blurted out.

My eyes widened when I realized how upfront and rude that was. It was probably a touchy subject. There you go again, Blair, getting into other peoples business. I rolled my eyes at myself.

I looked up to Jax to see him now fidgeting with his own hands, “I don't know.” he sighed “Maybe he just �" couldn't handle the pressure of everything that was going on at the time.”

I stared intently at him as his eyes were filled with sadness, “That's no reason to leave you guys to cope with the pain of that.” I shook my head

“We had each other.” he snapped, rather quickly and harshly.

“I'm sorry, I shouldn't have brought it up.” I bit the inside of my lip looking down

“No, it's fine.” he grabbed my hand in a reassuring way, causing my entire body to stiffen under his touch “I shouldn't of snapped at you.” he looked at me with emotion filled eyes.

I swallowed and finally found my voice “I-it's okay.” my eyes still stayed wide.

He let out a breath of relief and let go of my hand, causing me to just want to whimper and grab his hand back. What the hell is wrong with me. Why are my thoughts betraying me. I furrowed my eyebrows together trying to convince myself that his touch meant nothing, and I was just imagining the electricity.

“I know.” I said

“Know what?” he asked, raising his eyebrows

“How it feels, to lose a mother.” I stated “I lost mine when I was 8. She was a hardcore smoker and she was diagnosed with lung cancer. Those last 3 months were a traumatizing experience.”

“I'm so sorry,” he apologized, but I raised my hand queuing him to shut up

“I'm not saying this to make you feel sorry for me, I'm saying this because you need to know you're not the only one who has lost someone they care about more then anything.” I finished.

“Thank you,” he mumbled, barely audible

“You're welcome.” I smiled

Then the next thing he did took me by suprise, he wrapped his strong arms around my tiny figure and pulled me into his hard chest, resting his chin on my shoulder. It took me a moment to respond, but my small arms finally made their way to his back and I returned to embrace, ignoring the tingles shooting on my spine. I buried my forehead into his shoulder.

“Thank you for not hating me.” he finally said after a few moments of comfortable silence

I smiled into his shoulder. Next thing I knew, the door swung open revealing a smiling Cole with a tray of soup, but his smiled quickly faded into a scowl whenever he caught sight of me and Jax. My eyes widened in horror as I quickly backed away from Jax. I looked up to him, and his eyes showed hurt and confusion.

Cole was next to Jax in a flash, pulling him by the back of his shirt collar and rushed out the door with him, slamming and locking it behind him. I looked towards the door, and then at the soup on the dresser, and then back to the door. I heard yelling and arguing but my brain was to fuzzy to even comprehend what they were yelling about.

What the f**k just happened?