Impact

A true life story about a near death experience and what I learned from my mistake. Also a mock college essay.

Impact

 

                Blood dripped from my lips as I lay in a steep icy sea of snow.  My legs were askew and pain shot from my pelvis to my head, reminding me of the harsh impact with a tree I had experienced just seconds before.

 An hour earlier my family, a few close friends and I arrived at the Hunter Mountain Snowboarding Resort. A welcoming smell of pumpkin spice radiated throughout the lobby. After walking to the reception desk, both families signed in and received their equipment. Matthew, my close friend, and I were led by a professional trainer to a small bunny slope for training. I truly needed training, for it was my first time officially snowboarding. The teacher made it clear leaning is a supreme tactic when trying to turn. We practiced for around thirty minutes while brisk wind washed fine snow particles into our exposed faces. Once our trainer thought we were knowledgeable enough, he allowed us to ride the lift to a small slope; the “family” slope.

The sight from the lift was outstanding; it made me look forward to the thrills ahead. Lush green pines spread throughout the fresh fluffy white snow. My body began to tremble once nearing the top, however, the lift continued once arriving, thus we prepared to hastily hop off. Without much trouble I stood up and slid over to the hill. Standing near the edge, I bravely stared down the slope. I wasn’t so confident at the time, thus, I kindly allowed Matthew to go first. He slowly proceeded down the not so steep incline. After taking a shallow breath, for the air was thin at this height, I advanced to the edge of the descending slope. Leaning forward in terror, I started my daring trip down the haunting slope. I leaned to bring myself parallel with the width of the hill to slow my descend. Proceeding down the hill, I gained more confidence with each passing second. My legs became accustom to the strenuous rotating. Eventually, I made it to the bottom without falling once. Wanting to ride again, I ascended on the lift. After a faster ride down the hill, my friend Matt bet we could ride the intermediate hill. My younger sibling and his friends followed us to the lift. I felt fully confident, thus we proceeded up a different lift to take on the harder hills.

 The air became colder and my breath shallower. Moreover, my legs began shaking as I stared at the intimidating intermediate hill. Its sharp turns and icy path impaired even seasoned veterans. I stared at death face to face; I was terrified. Upon reaching the top, I looked down at the abrupt fall of the hill. The incline looked significantly steeper here then on the lift. Wind wailed around my body, weakening my ability to stand. I felt dizzy for a moment, but regained confidence when I recognized Matthew edging up to the slope. The calming smell of pine wisped through the air and cleared my head. Although hesitant, peer pressure completed my confidence as we pushed off down the hill.

Beginning with a slow descent, I thought, “Why was I even scared? This hill is simple.” After the first turn the hill became steeper, the second even more vertical. Wind howled past my body, making tears streak around my face. My speed increased exponentially as I darted down the daunting hill. The hill was much more difficult then I imagined, but I pressed on, not wanting my friends to belittle me.  Pieces of ice shot up from my snowboard, blinding my view of what lay ahead. After clearing the melted ice from my eyes, I spotted an abrupt left turn. Reaching the bend, I felt horror overcome my body. The incline was nearly 65 degrees. The rapid fall increased my speed to surpass any previous velocity of mine. I struggled to slow my descent, but it was in vain. Somehow my board shifted around and made me turn backwards. I was now staring at the icy terrain beneath me, unaware what was to come.

Thankfully the board started gripping the slick ice, however, it didn’t bring me to a stop. Without warning, I felt the board lose friction with the ground. While flying through the air I truly thought I was about to die. About a half second later my lower back impacted a large pine. My body caught up with the initial impact and smacked into the tree. Pain gnawed though my body, crawling up my back and to my head as I let out a screech. I fell ten feet lower on the steep cliff, landing with my face downward and my feet awry upward. To my surprise, I wasn’t dead, but I thought my back was shattered. I believed I’d never be able to walk again, restrained to a wheelchair for the rest of my life. I cried out for Matthew, because I didn’t want him to leave me. He came to the edge and quickly flagged down his brothers to watch me. Matthew road his snowboard to the nearest building and told them what happened. A rescue squad hurried to my aid. They stumbled down the steep incline to help me. One tested to see if I could feel anything below my waist; I answered yes.

The crew carefully lifted my body from the cliff and laid me in a sled behind their snowmobile. The snowmobile started up and brought me to the safety of a warm building. Although restrained to a wheelchair for the rest of the day, not a bone was broken and I recovered within a few days. This was truly a miracle.

This experience taught me three things: one, listen to advice and instruction with extreme care, two, be patient and don’t push yourself too quickly, three, never give up. I’m determined to apply these principles to my life. They will allow me to excel above others while setting a good example. I will lead courageously, not willing to give up, but know my limits; reject passivity, listen to advice while accepting discipline.

Once my body recovered, I returned to the dreaded Hunter Mountain Snowboard Resort. Although skeptical, I used my past mistakes as an advantage. This time I carefully listened to my teacher’s instructions. I mimicked his every move, soaking in his precious information. My instructor and I rode the lift to a gradual hill. I practiced my turning with care, honing my skills to take on the black diamonds. After almost 30 minutes of turn training, I was ready to dive down my first black diamond.

I conquered the hill with ease and satisfied my hunger for revenge.  Listening to my teacher’s instruction, I glided back and forth down the hill to slow my decent. I’ll never forget how important heeding instruction is. Furthermore, patiently training instilled knowledge inside of me to defeat the hill I once dreaded. Falling off the hill was a good thing for my future. It showed me to not be hasty when lacking the knowledge or skills needed to take on more difficult tasks.  If I had been patient riding the easy hills until I could do them blind folded, I’d much more easily have taken the sharp turn that almost killed me.

Although terrified of the daunting Hunter Mountain, I returned. I didn’t give up because of my near death experience.  I persisted and challenged the hills yet again. One who is determined will succeed in life. Furthermore, that person will rise above others, not willing to back down. His tenacious attitude grants him unparalleled endearment from his managers and coworkers. That’s why I strive to be that person.

When you accept me into your college, I will strive to excel in whatever I do. I will learn from my mistakes while heeding discipline and instruction to become a better student.  I will set a hardworking example and teachers will enjoy me as a student because I will listen, question, and then apply their words. I’ve carefully studied your prestigious programs. Your welding class will help me abound in my area of expertise. I’ve read your teachers are not only the best; they perfectly relay the information their students need to succeed. Your campus is clean and bright which displays dedicated care for your students. There isn’t a better school for me to join. I’m looking forward to seeing you next semester. 

Author's Note

It would be much appreciated if anyone committed. Constructive criticism reviews are welcome.

Reviews

[~*~Peace Keeper~*~]

Wow, thank God He was watching over you! This sounds like a very scary and painful experience, but thankfully you are okay! I think you did a great job in writing this, you were very descriptive. However, I did notice one line, "Pain gnawed though my body," I think you meant to write through, but that is an easy mistake. I am curious to see how you will edit your first draft to make it even more real for the readers.

Great Job

[JesseLKellogg]

I am very thankful he was watching over me. I might not be here today if not. Thanks for catching that. I'm sure my writing coach will as well haha.

[~*~Peace Keeper~*~]

^^ You're welcome, lol well at least you have a writing coach to catch stuff, people like that are very nice to have xD I think all writers need them, I have a terrible time always switching back and forth from present tense and past tense it seems, probably among other things I don't catch lol

[~*~Peace Keeper~*~]

^^ Oh this is an interesting essay for a college, I like how you tied it all together in the end, learning from your mistakes and then working to be better and how you will apply this to regular life. I would think it would be hard to come up with what to write for an essay like this xD but it seems you did a great job, I think they would like it and see that you are determined and ready to listen and learn instead of jumping ahead, that is exactly what the colleges are looking for, dedicated students. So you want to become a welder?

[JesseLKellogg]

To be honest, I didn't read the assignment my coach sent me right. All I had was the story about hitting the tree. So, after she told me of my horrid mistake, I tied together how I learned from the experience. I was surprised to see how well it fit haha.

[~*~Peace Keeper~*~]

^^ Well that is okay, at least she pointed it out for you and you could fix it, you did a really good job. Has she read it yet and told you what she thinks?

[JesseLKellogg]

Yes. She actually said the college couldn't refuse to let me in.

[~*~Peace Keeper~*~]

^^ Yes exactly my thought! lol

[Jeremy Hiles]

Wow man, glad you're ok! I don't remember hearing about this happening to you?! I was kind of wondering why you would write something like this, but now I know lol. Good storrytelling here, definitely a striking introduction/beginning!