The So Called 'Friend'

watch out! there are people who pretend to hug you but instead stab you.

I was never into all you do

But once I stepped in I couldn’t go

 

Yours smiles, your words and fake etiquette

Cast a spell on me which I refused to hate

 

I made you my friend without realization

That there was no match for our mental synchronization

 

Gradually I felt there was something surely wrong

You had been using me for your purpose for so long

 

You never really cared about any of my deeds

Unless I was there to cater your needs

 

But I can’t bear this now I’m way too sore

Though you’ve made me a fool you won’t anymore

Author's Note

Sometimes there are people who just fake around and pretend to be your friend. But they forget that you exist when you need help.
Please vote and comment on my poem-it would mean a lot :)

Reviews

[An owl on the moon]

This is so filled with the pain caused by those who are too shallow to really love, to be a true friend that stays close no matter what. And though you write of the sorrow, you write of the strength as well, to move on with your life and not be pulled back anymore. Powerful.

[Jess]

Yesss...Thank you :)

[Celie Rose]

I enjoyed reading your poem. heartfelt, expressive, meaningful, emotional write....bitter sweet Well written. Keep writing.

[Jess]

Thank you:)

[KLH]

It is a very painful moment when you realize you thought you could call someone a friend, just to find out they had no interest in friendship but only getting what they want. Sometimes i wish people could remember how to treat others the way they wish to be treated.

[Jess]

true...
thank you:)

[samparks,sam]

That right but want to you make be positive, came out from fear in new sun rise

[David Marsden]

The theme in this poem is clear and I like the way the story unfolds, from the friendship and infatuation of someone not worthy, to the realisation that something is wrong and finally the strength and wisdom to break away and become stronger.
Bear mentioned the song 'The Back Stabbers,' I remember it well, another song that comes to mind is Gloria Gaynor's I Will Survive.
If this poem has come from experience, which I sense it has, then you are a strong person and you will surely survive..

[Jess]

Well, yea...i guess personal experiences just let you discover the finer details.
Thank you for reviewing :)

[Bear]

Critique: (But I can’t bear this now I’m way too soar) sore

Review: Shades of The O'jays song "Back Stabbers" (they smile in your face all the time they want to take your place). You have some killer rhymes, realization and synchronization show's you have a good vocabulary and knowledge of the words usage. The complex understanding of human behavior is also reflected in the workings of this poem so well done. Standing Ovation! Clap! Clap! Clap!

[Jess]

oh yea i'll correct it

[Jess]

Thank you for the appreciation!

[annalysiar]

This is a wonderfully conveyed message. And too understandable. People don't see past the first layer, past their selves. Wonderful write.

[Jess]

thank you:)

[annalysiar]

You're more than welcome😃 it was an honor to have read

[Inject Positivity]

Well you have conveyed a very true message by this poem....In this modern world it is hard to find an honest and 'frnd' like frnd....People take advantage of you when they need you and when their purpose gets fulfilled they even refuse that they ever knew you.....Wonderfully done and i would give you full ratings for the concept of your poem.....Clappings!!!! God bless you....

[Jess]

thank you!!!

[Inject Positivity]

Always welcome my frnd...

[Rafy T.Nym]

Truth!I think when true and honest words are expressed through a poem, the poem becomes lively and lovely.

Just a note to add, you should write more poetry, practice is important to create better works. Best wishes for you.

[Jess]

Thank you...writing is my passion and i'm working on polishing my writing skills, I'm an 8th grader right now. hahaha
anyways thank you again

[Rafy T.Nym]

My pleasure. :-)

[Leon C]

Nicely observed view of relationships or one particular type of relationship.

I felt this section felt a little clunky
"You never really cared about any of my deeds, Unless I was there to cater your needs"

overall nice work

[Jess]

thank you :)
i'll try to improve

[Leon C]

Not a matter of you improving; it just needs a little more polishing