Part 4: Skylar

I kept my head down as the casket was lowered into the dark soil of the graveyard, too afraid to watch. I couldn't admit to myself that this was all happening; I couldn't look up and watch my father be lowered into the ground, knowing that this was all my fault.

I wiped my eyes away, trying not to smudge my eyeliner, and gripped my mothers hand hard. She squeezed back, and whispered something under her breath. I knew the second we got home she would blame me; it would be the car ride home that would put her in the mindset for blame, and turn to the closest person: me.

I heard the last words being said before it would be the end of the funeral, and heard people shift in their seats, and get up to leave. My mother got up to leave, pulling my hand as she tried to move with me.

I remained still.

"We can't leave without him," I muttered, crying harder than before, "we can't leave without dad." My words felt as hollow as I did, loss and depression begining to fall over me.

"He'll never leave us Sky," my mother cooed, "and we'll never leave him."

I felt the atmosphere begin to cool, and clouds formed and blocked out the sun. A cool mist began to fall after a moment, my mother giving me a moment before leaving him. She released my hand and placed it on my shoulder, massaging it gentily.

"Let's go before you catch a cold." I let her lead me to the car, my mind remaining empty the whole time, too afraid to think.

It's all my fault, it's my fault, it's my fault, I kept reminding myself. It's all your fault.

When we arrived home, my mother left the car without saying a word, and left me sitting in the car, alone. I knew it, I knew she'd balme me. Why else would she have left me there?

I curled myself into a tight ball, and wept for what felt like hours, wishing I could turn back time to save him. "Daddy..." I muttered through my trembling lips and teeth, make up running down my face uncontrolibly, my eyes beginning to burn

I looked out the window and watched the rain falling, remembering how much he loved the rain. We would always go out and swim in the rain, or splash around in puddles or take long walks.

He was my hero, and he was gone because of me.

"I remember the last thing I said to you daddy," I said loudly, "I said I hated you because you wouldn't let me go out, but I don't. I never did! I hope you knew that," I said, crying harder and harder, my words begining to slur together.

"Daddy, I love you, I always will."

Author's Note

ignore bad spelling and grammer

Reviews

[Aleyah]

Ahhhhhhhhhhh! The anticipation is killing me!!!!!!!!!!!! I love this. Love it love it love it. So sad. It's awesome. You really captured me with the girl's sadness this time. Like hardcore. Awesome job.