Passer by

my hearts been broken but with all I have i go forward,

the bandage is ripping and i haven't the time to stop,

but good god how i want to stop.

fall the the ground, feel my knee's drop,

to the earth and ask god why i bear this heavy chest,

ever since we spiraled I wonder what has ever been the best,

for me, what something will we ever be.

it's always what you need and you never stop to calculate,

how long it's been since my guard fell and my heart began to calibrate 

so perfectly,

with the veins in your wrists as they brush my insecurities away, cutting deep, 

only to bring them back as your hand falls beside the bed frame tonight in a desperate sleep.

Your lack of desire,

my keen sense of brokenness and all that I require,

it's not a lot and should be some kind of second nature,

to you,

why darling?

why do you make me so blue?

I took all these moments in photo form out of the compartment in my chest,

But there's more. 

this little leather handbag that is worn,

is actually an organ that has pumped the blood through my pathetic body since the day i was born,

now it's broken up and healing,

in thick leather skin that's peeling,

and if you asked if i could spare a feeling,

i'd say go ask the man in the mirror, 

he may give back all the love he's been stealing.  

Perhaps you never noticed these thoughts inside my head,

they show them selves in speckles on my tongue but never once stepped outside it instead,

they categorize, and i write them after you make me feel dead,

In my opinion, I should have fled.
but what should we do when the rope pulls so tight,

in you're mind is like you want to ask me to walk it and see if I make it to the other side,

you lied,

and all i know from here on in is that i tried, 

i tried my hardest from the first time,and i'm tied, to the familiarity of your mouth, your eyes,

even though they lie, they make me feel invincible when I want to hide, 

so what do we no when the knot becomes loose, 
I don't care
I haven't anything left to lose. 

I took all of our memories and moments,

just to hold them, get to know them,

never throw them away,

because it seems like all the good in life is a passer by and never intends to stay,

all the times you looked at me,

and i fell blindly before you even touched me,

you never touch me.

Now it's like I'm a monster in your dead eyes,
But i follow you like a lost puppy,

miserably,

devotedly,

even though you take the sun from my skies and you're killing me,

I want to be,

I want to be,

my god, that scares the hell out of me. 

 

Reviews

[zainul]

Wonderful feelings expressed wonderfully.

[deaths calling]

its beautiful i love it

[Simon Welsh]

This is beautiful. I love the fraught emotions. Perfect.