Murder Blueprint - Chapter 1

A murder mystery. Samantha the main character is assigned to write a report on her sisters car accident. However she learns that the shocking truth isn't always easy to handle and when an accident turns into a murder who will she turn to?

 

 

 

Samantha Ann Rose suddenly awoke in the middle of the night to the startling suspicion that someone was watching her. Slowly reaching over to the lamp beside her bed, not even daring a breath she pulled on the light. A knot of unbearable fear in her stomach, glancing around the room she saw no one, slowly breathing a sigh of relief she looked over at the alarm clock on her night table, 4:00 am read the blinding numbers. Two more hours until she had to get up for work.

It had been two months since her sister had died, and what felt like the hundredth time Sam had felt the sneaking suspicion that someone was watching her, dark eyes piercing through her watching her every move, trying to tell her something, what? She didn’t know, she only hoped for it to stop.

All too soon came the shrill ring of her alarm, 6:00 am always came to early. Groaning, Sam slowly rolled out of bed and went out to the kitchen to start her coffee pot. An hour later she was fully dressed in dark blue jeans, heeled boots and a brown jacket, sitting in front of a half drank coffee and a smothering cigarette only wishing she were somebody else.

“Good morning Ms. Rose! Ready to get to work! hollered Arthur, her co-worker. Sam quietly mumbled back a reply, Arthur was the favoured, hard working person at the office that no one could stand, but who the boss loved.

Sam worked for the Seattle times, as a reporter. As a child she wanted nothing more than to work for a newspaper, to write about the events that took place in the city in which she lived. Now grown up and fully understanding the downfalls of the career she chose, she loathes her job. There are too many heartbreaking stories, so many people she has to upset in order to get her paper written. She hated falling asleep at night with images of the murders she had to write about, the car crashes, the suicides. However, she did what she had to in order to live in this constant money-gobbling economy. Sitting at her desk staring down at the stories scattering her desk wondering which she should read first she hear Mr. Devon, her boss call her into his office. “I want you to do a report on Shannon Rose” he told her solemnly. Sam’s breath caught in her through and chills were sent down her spine when she heard those words travel from his lips, she wished and hoped with all her might that she did not just hear him say that, but then he continued. “I know this must be hard for you, in light of what has recently happened. I thought about giving this story to someone else but truthfully, you need this Samantha. Lately you have been doing poorly and giving me almost nothing to publish, I understand it’s been a difficult time for you but I’m telling you now this story is the last thing that could save your career” Sam couldn’t believe what she was hearing, having to write a report on her sisters death, she couldn’t imagine anything worse. “Sam.. The media is going crazy over it, they want to know what really happened” “what do you mean what happened!” exclaimed Sam “my sisters death was an accident!” but the look in his eyes argued otherwise, without him having to say a word. As painful as Sam knew this story would be, she agreed to write it.

Author's Note

Please review, constructive criticism is welcomed. Anything to help
Thank you in advance.
Ps. please keep posted for more chapters.

Reviews

[bluessadmood]

Its very nice my friend,your style is so good,and as usual I loved Sam your hero in the story..
Now why I always like the main character ,I think most here put so much of themselves in
the main character,and off course they will tell the good things ha ha,but off course you could always dramatize
and add some fantasy to the events,make them run a little faster..as I see it ,it looks like a crime story
but I would love it to be out of the usual ,like adding some romantic and poetic ramblings into it..
its just my idea off course its all up to you dear..I am sure you have already made a plot to it
I will wait for more..please excite me..I love to be thrilled every now and then..
lovely write..

[Gary H]

OK, so the idea works. The end of the first chapter leaves everything on a cliffhanger - we all read and wonder what will happen next.

I would suggest you look at the layout which will entice more to read this. Leave line gaps between paragraphs and when speech occurs. This breaks up the bank of words and makes it more inviting.

Also read and re-read your opening paragraph - Samantha Ann Rose suddenly awoke in the middle of the night to the startling suspicion that someone was watching her. ( First impression is this line is too long. You can create an atmosphere much better missing this out so the story starts - Slowly reaching over to the bedside lamp Samantha switched on the light). Then..... With A knot of unbearable fear in her stomach she was glanced around the room with a startling suspicion that someone was watching her. However there was no one. Breathing a sigh of relief she looked over at the alarm clock. The blinding numbers read 4:00 am. There were two more hours until she had to get up for work.

There is an opportunity later to mention her full name if you do miss out the first line. The idea when writing a story is to balance between 'showing' and 'telling'. Also make sure you write in the same tense.

I am not being clever. Have just studied on a University writing course and these are some of the things that I learnt.