4D Memories

A poem about memories so clear, it's like you experience them in real time with all their details.

4D memories
Transcending time and space
Pregnant with clarity and
Sensation on my face

Preserved within my heart
Imprinted on my soul
Recalled not in part
These memories,
Completely whole

Unlike fuzzy recollections
Triggering whispers
Of my former self
My 4D memories
Live in my heart
Golden and clear, part
Of my identity

My first taste of independence
My hands on the wheel
I could feel
The freedom wind blowing
through my hair
in the cool fall air
Elated joy, river flowing
Bridge's orange yellow light
My first solo flight
From that day on
Could always rely upon
Escaping with my car
Safety never far

Walking proud, my college degree
The first one in my family
Celebrating with relief and joy
Surrounded by friends and my boy
Laughter filled my spirit
To my left,
the high school prom queen
Who had been so mean
Walked alone

Raining after the long hot summer
Finally coming to a close
Papers signed on the loan
The Xanadu house was our own
Jumping with joy we ran through
Flipping on lights
To the future of me and you

The Diagnosis came
On Tuesday afternoon
The Hospital room
Starkly sterile and same
Our lives shaken to the core
Life after...is nothing
Like life...before

Faces she loved
Tucked her old body into bed
She laid her head
For her final sleep
We could barely weep
Saying our goodbyes
With her clarity so wise
Knowing that she chose
How spirit her goes
Exiting this place
With beauty and grace

The list goes on
So look back upon
Your own identity
What is your 4D memory?

Author's Note

I've really struggled with this one , I still feel like I can't get it just right, but here it is either way.

Reviews

[Chris]

Do we really control where and how our scribbles lead us? And when we put the pen down and see the paths - how the edges are rough and sometimes sharp, sometimes age worn into shadows behind our eyes. The clarity of our "visions" of thens reflects our nows as well... it remains that maybe - just maybe - we really did deal with the hurt, anger, innocence, and guilt ...and the missing... along our ways.

[Jennesis]

Even your review is beautiful with your words Chris. Sometimes clarity comes as the words appear on the page right? Thanks so much~

[Chris]

You drew me in... and the thoughts held.

[Philip Muls]

Some milestones seem indeed larger than life itself, beyond 3D...

Maybe pre-birth archetypal impressions make up the 4th dimension. Sometimes an occurence can feel very symbolic, as if it is not the first time you have been there and done that. It resonates with the universe somehow, connectedness with life's intelligence.

Well, that is what your work triggered in me.

[Jennesis]

Thank you so much Philip. I agree with you. There are times that we just feel the sense of something more outside of ourselves. That deja vu feeling is so powerful. Thanks for stopping by!

[Insight "MH"]

Don't be hard on yourself, you made a nice job in making the reader enter these memories, they are so clear I bet everyone who read this lived every part mentioned with its emotions. Well done...

[dan]

Jennesis, Not only are your 4D memories vivid in your mind, they are so vividly written about in this piece. Your descriptions of these memories are written with such clarity it makes it feel like I TOO was there. The reality of these memories draw the reader in, as if saying, "Walk with me...."
My one small (constructive) critique? Since, in my opinion, you've already drawn the reader in...the last four lines seem a bit superfluous, unnecessary. The piece is SO well written...you can just end it without the four lines or add four lines in summation without the questioning of the reader. I hope I'm making sense.
Haven't read or heard from you in so long. I'm on a mission to reconnect with my "old" friends. The last thing I wished to do was offer criticism, constructive or not. I hope you can understand. take care...dan

[Jennesis]

Dan! Thanks so much, the feedback is great. I appreciate it so much. I have been so busy I have not been writing as much. :) hope you're well

[dan]

Please feel free to send me read requests. It's the only way I can keep up with all of my friends' new writes. take care...dan

[Lydia Shutter]

There are certain moments in our lives that stand out as the most important...even if someone else would see them as inconsequential. These memories are tangible and we revisit them through the years. I think they comfort us on some level. Your words are beautifully written and the rhyming flows well. Lydi**

[Jennesis]

Well said Lydi, only we can see the significance of them in our lives. Thanks so much~

read moreWell said Lydi, only we can see the significance of them in our lives. Thanks so much~

jennesis

[ANTO]

You certainly paint a vivid picture with your words good enough to make me feel the fourth dimension.

I encountered an article (when I was trying to find out what happens during sudden death) and from the article I found that the brain is actually quite slow to assimilate the data being sent to it by the senses and theres a school of thought that says that the thing we know of as de-ja va could just be the brain catching up with the senses and creating false memories. But I like to think that we may have been here before and have some memory of that in our next incarnation.

[Jennesis]

Thanks ANTO, I agree with you about deja vu. It's like I want to believe that in some way, something spiritual is happening that is sending me the message that I am exactly where I am supposed to be. There is a thought in my field, that there is a part of our brain that doesn't tell time, that it can't distinguish between a million years ago and right now. The oldest parts of our brain always win the wrestle of logic and fear. ;-)

[David Scott]

I am pondering a meaning review here Jennesis...
Honestly, your name gave me the thought. 4D is the ability to make each moment its own "Genesis" rather than some profound conclusion or point of arrival. If every thought sparks a new beginning we will live beyond contemplation and beliefs. We will actually begin to simple be.
Maybe...
Loved the write. Good to read your wok again.

[Jennesis]

I love that thought David! Every thought a new beginning and the power to just be, pure consciousness. Pretty fantastic. Thanks so much for reading~
J

[David Scott]

If only... One day. :)

[A hare off]

I think it is wonderful. Memories are held by everyone differently even to the point of changing over the years. Some are embellished and some soften for our own sake, but the best memories are the ones we see clearly no matter how far in the past they originally occurred. Really good writing.

[Jennesis]

Thank you A hare off! I appreciate your words. Memories and how our brain stores them all differently depending on the nature of the emotion is fascinating to me. Either way, they are a part of our story.

[A hare off]

My pleasure Jennesis, but I don't know where the hell memorex came from. :) I fixed it.

[Nigel Newman]

Jennesis Hi. This is very evocative. And to answer your 4D question, frankly; my father on holiday relaxing and smoking in the early morning before anyone else might appear, when he never smoked otherwise; at my parents' request being taught to waltz by the holiday camp entertainment manager behind the closed stage curtains, and hating every scary moment of being so close to him; another is my wife screaming at me to take the wired electric lamp I was holding away from the water and out of the bathroom when I was video'ing her washing our young son (luckily no electric shocks incurred!). I won't say I never think about these things, but your poem certainly brought them closer to the surface.

As for your doubts about the poem, I have a thought, but first to say it is beautifully painted and, as you can see, achieves at least some of what you had in mind. I think your struggle may be related to the way you change depth in the second half of the poem; the first half is really snapshots, while the later part goes into deeper grieving and a more spelled out series of memories. One option would be to limit the final part to the same snapshot level and then devote a whole dedicated poem to going deeper. At the back of my mind I'm thinking there may be a way to 'reconcile' the two depths within the one poem, but I can't quite pin it down.

Hope this helps, and nice job!
Regards
Nigel

[Jennesis]

Nigel,

THanks for the feedback. I actually responded to this review right afterwards but I notice it isn't showing up. SO thank you so much, I love your 4 D answers. I appreciate the feedback about the depth being different, it was hard to remedy this I agree. Perhaps I will rework. Thanks again~
Jenn

[jacob erin-cilberto]

i like this piece and relate to it muchly...

My friends cannot believe the details i remember from times, even back in the fifties when i was a kid in NY or times we had up in Vermont...like a steel trap, my mind has pictures...labels of records...groups who did songs...not always information that is worthwhile for anything other than some memories...but that vividness...yes, that vividness...like it happened yesterday.

j.

[Jennesis]

That's so cool Jacob! I love how our memories work, storing them differently depending on the time. The information in your pictures are rich, even if they only hold meaning for you.