Feels a lot like Failure

Smoking lots of cigarettes
Failing school and cadets
What am I doing to myself

Wasting the weekend away
My ropes to society start to fray
On this bright day in May

Call me when this phase ends
I’m losing myself in the trends
Losing myself, losing my friends

I can’t stand what I’m doing to me
But ma, can’t you see
I’m doing this for a fee

My health, my grades my life
Just can’t get through this strife
And I’m lookin at the shiny silver knife

I’m hatin everyday
And so if I may
Say what I have to say

And if I could please
Just try to appease
And get on my knees

And beg for your forgiveness

Cause I miss you
And what I used to be
I miss the good old days
When I felt like I was free

I miss the days
When the worst thing I did
Was take your chocolate chips
On a Saturday afternoon

I miss the days
When everything was so simple
When I could cry just to cry
And I didn’t have to say goodbye
To those innocent times

I miss the good times
And I miss the bad, no matter how bad
It was all about the times we had
Everything so simple, yet so complicated

I can’t stand what I’m doing to me
But ma, can’t you see
I’m doing this for a fee

Hey, you hurt me
But I don’t really care anymore
Hey, I’m not the same me
I know I can be a sore

But you’re gonna have to bear with me
Live through the triumphs,
And live through the pain
Because in the end
There is something to gain

So bear with me
So that we don’t blow up
The damaged bridge between us
I can see what you see
I don’t like it
I just wanna be me

Reviews

[Jen]

Thank you everybody for the comments :)

[Roo]

This is a really powerful read. Insiteful, emotional and many people can relate to the feelings expressed in it. amazing job.

[Naomi Montana Walsh]

The struggles of life remain always, your poem is insiteful because you see the the twist and turns and you will bare them and learn from them .
Poetry is a great way to do that and you do write well.

[Emma]

i love how the language is so simple but you can still really feel the emotion, and it's really well written, with the rhyme scheme especially, which adds a lot. and it flows REALLY well.

[deeps]

Now this says alot and filled with so much emotion
This is such a sad write here. I like it such a amazing flow.
You have talent!

[apocalypse]

The "you" you've lost and the new person you think you've changed into..just an opinion...both of them are just different shades of you. Life tries to bring them all out. I've felt that way...and this is what I've made of it.

Good flow.
The emotion passed on well.

[Sharkapillar]

Aww this was so sad. I could feel the emotion as I read. The flow was ezxcellent, the rhyme scheme perfect. Amazing write. ♥