And here she is...

*Unfinished* Docken finally calls the girl, and they go out at night for something to eat.

“Okay...okay...like it’s easy right? Yeah? Yeah! Okay..” I exhaled my breath and tried to put thoughts together, but of course the procrastination came. I kinda just sat on the edge of my bed and looked around my room. It was never up to Mum’s standard of ‘clean’ but at the same time I doubt I’d get on Hoarders. That was another thing that I’d just throw away a few hours doing: sitting in one spot and watch images move on a screen, whilst daylight passes and I’d never notice it. I think the most unorganized thing in my room was my desk, it was pretty much covered in notes and pictures and journals, except for the middle. The middle was where I would make a little space for myself to create more notes and doodles. As I grew older they were often left unfinished and disregarded. It was actually kinda funny looking back through some of the stories, poems or drawings and just seeing where my mind said ‘Nah, you can do other things now.’ I want to  stop referring to my mind as another organ. Cause if you think about it, it’s actually you. It’s your thought and how you move and do anything. You are your brain, and sometimes that freaks me out.

As a kid, I could stay on something for hours. I mean for instance my Dad had these boxed race cars about the size of a toothpaste box, but maybe a little shorter. Anyways, inside was a scale model of a classic car and he’d collected them when he was a kid at the place he used to work way back when and there was a whole box of them in the loft. They were imported from England I think and I guess that made them really cool to me. I remember finding one that I really liked, it was a Maserati 250F and had the number 8 on the front in a white bubble. I used to build a little garage out of Lego then move Lego men to pretend they were breaking into the garage and stealing the car. I did this over and over for ages, I even lost the car somehow and looked through the box again for a replacement. Luckily there was a another Maserati but it had the number 12 on it.

Anyways, the point of that story is to show how my mind has changed. The thing that entertains me has changed for one thing. I went from creation in my hands, to creation from my hands. I used to be able to sit in bed for ages, when I should of been trying to get to sleep and instead just play, I’d find something or anything to entertain me. And now, I’m ashamed to say, I can’t create my own entertainment as easy, I need something to help me. I rely on the things man has created on this earth to help me get through my days on this earth. I used to be able to look at something, fiddle with it, and after a while turn it into a whole new thing to play with. Now I can’t even finish my notes. But then again maybe thats just how everyone develops. I’m a teenager now, maybe I’m supposed to get bored of what I know I can do so I can go on to do more things. Maybe that burst of needing to do something with my life is from the fact I procrastinate. Maybe, procrastination is evolutions way of making me get up try something new. The only thing I have to do now, is go out and do it.

“Okay… so go out and do it right?” I became aware I was just talking to myself, in my room and it didn’t even feel strange. I was so used to talking to myself, and not in a unhealthy mental way, just normally talking to myself. If that’s a thing? “Oh man, I’m not gonna be able to do this am I?”. I looked down and stared at that winkey face. The one at the end of my ‘Ohh The Mystery’ contact. It just kinda fit the way I remembered her. I mean sure she was a little goofy and cute and confident but kinda shy, which I don’t even know how she pulls that off. I’m not sure really, it just made me smile. I pressed the call button, put it to my ear and waited.

There was this unfamiliar voice on the other end of the phone. It said hello, it seemed polite, it waited for a response, it was an older voice, it wasn’t her. She gave me a fake number, I mean of course she did. Who In their right mind gives their number to some random guy at a par- “Wait, why are you on my phone...who called me?” I heard in the background. “Whhhhy are you smiling like that?...IS THAT HIM?”. I put my my hand to my face and kinda stroked my lips as I smiled, I’m not sure why, maybe it was nerves or something. I just felt overly happily to hear her voice again. I could hear the phone shuffle and it seemed like my time to speak. “Erm..” I chuckled “Err...Hey? Or Hi? Is..is it Hey or Hi?” I started to think about it for a second and then she said “I don’t know, whatever gets the conversation going I guess”. I kinda shook my head in agreement and continued. “Well then, Hey!” I said whilst kinda playing my hair in some sort of awkward thing to do. She said ‘Hi’ back, but almost in this way where she knew she was being awkward. I thought to myself that this was the time to go out and do something, I breathed in and went for it. “Okay, so it’s like...oooh it’s actually pretty late. Actually that might work out better, have you eaten yet?” She said she hadn’t and I asked if her family had plans to. “Docken, are you asking me out on a date?” she said in this patronizing way. I have to admit I went a bit flustered. ‘Nooooo. Just, I mean we’re both humans.” She grunted a little in agreement which I found amusing. “Well, I assume we’d both like to eat in a civil way, and if you don’t have plans and I don’t have plans, well then I got a plan.”

Honestly I didn’t even think of it as a date of any sort. I justed wanted to get to know her more, that and I’m so bored of everything lately. I wanted something new. I hadn’t spoken to Weller or Flut in ages, we didn’t really speak outside of school a whole lot, I liked it that way better because we had more to talk about when we did see each other. I guess I wanted a new person to tell all of my old stories to, but someone with a bit more brain capacity than the guys. Someone who I could have a real deep conversation with and then 5 seconds later have a tickle fight. I guess I don’t know what I want really, I don’t even know if she’ll be anything like what I need. What I do know is that I can’t handle a relationship, and by way I read her I don’t think she wants one either.

“Well It’s not exactly my turn to eat this week, so..” she whispered in a kinda silly voice. Just the plain stupidity of that joke had me smiling pretty much all the way to Arnolds Diner. After some joking around and talking she’d agreed to come out for something to eat. I told my Mum and she offered to give me some money, but I didn’t want to take any. I turned down her offer for a lift as well. She would always go out of her way to help as much as possible. I really did appreciate it, I just never showed it. I guess I’m pretty spoiled and don’t know how good I have it. I’ve started to try and tell her that I do appreciate all she does, but I mean it’s my Mum. It’s weird to actually say it all. I wonder if other kids get like that, or maybe somewhere down the line I got kinda messed up. Anyways as I walked around the corner I looked in.

Arnold wasn’t there, which sucked cause he’d always give me something for free. It was just the two waitress pouring coffee for people, it’s funny how some things live up to their stereotypes. I left a bit late because I just kinda sat in the kitchen, thinking about if I had everything I needed and then finally left. So I thought it odd when I couldn’t see her, thinking I was the late one. I put my hands in my hoodie pockets, moved my jaw sideways and breathed out. Maybe she just wasn’t going to show, or couldn’t make it. I looked at the menu to decide on what to order. A coffee and something to eat sounded pretty good. But I didn’t feel like any sort of cake type thing. The idea of them at that instant just seemed too gooey and sticky in my mouth.

Somehow my stomach told my brain “Dude, I couldn’t eat that, don’t even try.” I don’t really get how it does that. Really, if I control my body my brain just told it’s self not to eat that, but it also said that it’s hungry. So basicly my brain is having a conversation with itself, but I am my brain so subconsciously I’m talking to myself as I think to myself. Then when you think about all that you just think somehow something happened to make that: the brain, life, thought and even that gooey cake I don’t want. I don’t know it’s just all weird. I was deciding on either some sort of pie and cream or a sandwich. “Hey Weirdo.” I kinda froze and noticed I had this grin and stretched out my arms in my hoodie as I turned around.

There she was. The girl that had been on my mind for days, right there in front of me. Her hair was kinda messy but it looked great. Like it was meant to be that way, but it all kinda twirled lightly over itself in these strokes of blonde brownish hair. She didn’t really have a fringe, her hair swept from the right down to the left and it all just merged with in with it all. It covered her right eye and came down past her shoulder. She had adult eyes, assuming the other one looked kinda the same. I mean like you know when you can tell someone is an adult, well her eyes were just defined and grown up. She had dark eyelashes from masqara I guess, and I don’t know I just  liked her eyes at that moment. They were kinda squinting too, from the way she was smiling. I remember her smile from that party and it still lived up to it’s memory. Maybe it’s just the way the right amount of teeth were shown or because she had small lips. I mean not tiny, but well just cute I guess. The next thing you’d probably notice is the dimples, well I could only see one but then after that your focus would go back up to her woodland green eyes again and how just beautiful she looked.

I smiled back and wondered if she was thinking anything nearly the same as me. I slid into the booth and replied “Hi.”. “Actually, you were supposed to say ‘Hey’ “ she said matter of factly but in a sarcastic way as she handed me a menu and got one for herself. “Oh really, I thought it was just whatever gets the conversation going” I watched her chuckle as her eyes came up from the menu. “Erm, no… no it’s officially just ‘Hey’ now, I’ve changed my mind” I couldn’t help but smile at her brilliance, she had a quick answer for everything, but I remember thinking that this could end badly if I end up liking her. I tried to think of something to prevent it from happening, but I figured I’d think of something another time. Even if it did happen, I decided right then and there that I’d just never do anything about it. “Well, what if you change your mind again” I whispered. “Why are we whispering?” she happily asked in a faint voice. I mean come on, even her whisper was pretty much perfect for me.

“Well, it’s official, can’t be talking about the change of official things out loud. There’s people about ya’ know.” I think I stumped her and I was actually kinda proud about that. I guess I have a few quick answers as well. “Well that’s very true, maybe we should order something before the normal folk suspect something's up”. “I think I’ll just get a Coffee” I said and then she looked at me for a second “At this time of night?, and hey, you invited me out for a meal Docken”. To tell the truth I’d forgotten about the meal side of things. “Okay, okay...I’ll have the cream cracked lobster hog roast, with extra caviar” “That’s not even on the menu! And that’s gross!” she was laughing but kinda annoyed at me, it was like we became close in an instant.

Author's Note

I stopped writing as I couldn't get the right dialogue, without it being poor or stupid. I wanted to show the reader how they built a friendship in that cafe, and it would be sweet and the reader would be supporting of them two together from then on. But right now, I can't seem to create that. So I've stopped, and posted everything so far. Every chapter posted is unfinished and needs a lot of work. But I wanted to post it, to get more opinions in which way it needs that work. Thank you for reading!:) - Elliott