Ocean

Poem About A Church

 OCEAN

    _{jn / jg}

 

I lived in a house.

A burning house.

Stood solid within my house

for an instant and forever.

felt me...pre-personality

But then discovered that my house had a door

A door that didn't exist

A narrow two-story door

So, I walked on the floor to the door that didn't exist

and I looked out of my house

Not far out

I looked approximately the space between an electron

past the door

 

An ocean existed

 

There, standing on the floor of my house I gazed

out at my potential

And I lost my mind for awhile...an eternity

and/or an instant

You became me and I you

I remembered our pain and pleasure

And realized that I was neither

I stood adept and became aware of the moment,

aware of something different

I felt sex

but had longed for love

And I believed that love exists outside my house

I felt knowledge

but had longed for truth

And I believed that truth lives outside my house.

Perfection was somewhere between my opposite

I looked for a miracle

and found forgotten truths

 

Standing in my house was comfortable

I slowly passed myself by, left myself alone in my house

with the shadows

To bounce off the walls of choice

And I hurt myself till I stopped

Content with the fact I may never have

I lied to myself in my house

I dropped to my knees when I realized that

reason and belief lived on separate floors

In fact, they were the floors

And a light formed the roof, shining brighter each time

I approached the door.

Illumination was a self-imposed prisoner of the dark

A sleeping thought-adjuster

Whom formed the perfect halo about me

But, I lived separate under my halo

Between the floors of my house

Always living either upstairs or down

I felt unease in my house

 

I smelled smoke

With direction I fled to

the door that didn't exist

The glue of the space, architect of the void

Thinker of the thought adjuster

Thrusted my mind through the door and

abruptly pulled me back

As the smoke cleared in my burning house I smiled

Everything I did, I did for us

Everything you did, you did for us

The walls of my house were mirrors...thought reflectors

nothing else

My thoughts were waves floating on the sinusoidal essence

of probability

Waiting to be plucked

With intention

Pure intention...love intention

 

The fire burned with great intensity in my house

And as I pointed to the fire in my mirror

I desired freedom and the future materialized.

My house softened, the walls weakened

My house had always begun

I was always beginning

I'd always re-invented the same house...until that moment

I was in a new burning house

My house was my world

and my world was un-world

My truth was false

I had to let go the boundaries of self

As I became aware of life I ceased to die in my burning house

 

God how I loved my house,

The walls congealed together and fortified

 under the weight of the brightly burning roof

The floors swelled together and became one

The door of my philosophy was no longer needed

The door didn't exist for

I had become what I had sought

 

And the ocean rushed in

Because we really don't have to live in a house

 

Neither do you

 

 

 

We have just chosen too.