Crestfallen

How are you doing?
I’m not doing well.
Can’t I love you?
I can’t help myself from feeling this way.

Those days, I didn’t know it is love.
A distortion behind my calm face.
I don’t want other people notice it.
I struggle to hide it.

A sad, lonely night,
Just like the last day.
Your actions that meant “Goodbye”,
I remember it clearly.

Today, I hold my phone again.
But my weak fingers can’t push the buttons.
I said, "No it’s not a big deal".
I hold back and act normal again.

I’ll try to get ready to erase you from my life.
I’ll make an effort to forget you.
Why isn’t it working though, when I try so hard.
I’m supposed to get better as time goes by.

But unconsciously I’m looking at you again.
I was really happy because of you.
Without a doubt, I can’t still forget you.
How could I?

Is one year enough time for you?
Aren’t you even going to tell me to wait?
I miss you so much.
I want to see you every day.

That one gift given shyly.
You are beautiful.
You are all I need.
I keep it in a small quotation marks.