Unhealthy mistake

Sitting on the verge of a bed with my back

hunched passed my knees as my head tilts wile

I stare into space

 

Holding a bottle of Jack like my son with one

hand and balancing a cigarette between two of

my fingers in the other

 

I just had sex for all the wrong reasons; not even

deep breaths and several pitiful attempts of

self justification can rescue me

 

I turn my head as she removes herself from 

the covers of self loathing just to get my last glimpse

from behind

 

No matter how you look at it, eyes of lust will

always follow, but there’s no way I can look from

the front for the fear of complete self destruction

 

I can hear the sounds of silence as she slowly dresses

and leaves to rejoin humanity along with my dignity

 

The money’s by the door are the only words that are

spoken and the only words entrenched in memory    

 

  

Reviews

[emmajoy]

An honesty that rarely finds its way into the appreciation of how a piece is written rather than the crass 'wow, oh my'. You've written with verve and sincerity, certainly no frills or fun here but it's truth therefore, it packs a punch, same time, touches its nose at polite society.

Great stanza, ' Holding a bottle of Jack like my son with one ~ hand and balancing a cigarette between two of ~ my fingers in the other ..' interesting reference to a son .. a clue to the place outside this tableau.

[Nautili]

I like this, it takes something not written about much and it makes one think and feel the conflict between lustful desires and the sometimes after feeling of dirtiness. It is a powerful poem.

[KAREN]

Well crafted! And the reader can feel the shame in this poem. Nice imagery too!

[An owl on the moon]

A powerful scene that is painted on the soul's canvas... dark decisions made in silence for pleasures unspoken. What a moving music you've created.

[SlipKnoT]

wow im in awe

[Cassie Fraga]

WOW.... conviction speaks loud, the rawness is what I appreciate about it, very well penned my friend!! **tips my lyrical wand to you**

[TheSweet]

This is a masterful piece of writing. It's different, it flows so well, it's deep. This is the kind of peotry makes sifting through the dullness worth it :) Thanks a bundle!

[Tina Kline]

A most powerful poem of self-disgust and regret. This is excellent writing!

[Muse]

wow...a gutsy write.

Not many writers will make poetry out of taboo topics. Regret is an easy one to write about...but painting a path that bleeds into a downward spiral. That's fu**ing personal..and I admire that!

[...]

"Holding a bottle of Jack like my son"......Brilliant! Man, you got some style.

[unknown]

Ouch! I feel from this poem that there is something deeper and real that you are longing for. That the lust is beginning to tear you into pieces with the same routine. I could be wrong, but nonetheless this was a great poem.