Loosing you

Loosing you

A Poem by JayKay
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So this poem is from the last memory I have of my Grandma. She suffered dementia in the last years of her life. She always managed to recall who I was which I was grateful for.

"
I keep trying but I can’t quite,
put into words how I feel tonight.
It’s one of those days where I’m thinking of you,
And all the memories of the times we’ve been through.
One that springs to mind more often than not.
Was the last time I saw you, you were scared and you’d forgot.
You said you couldn’t remember how you’d come to be there.
With hospital gowns and dressed in hospital wear.
You asked if you were poorly and if you’d recover.
And you wanted to know what the doctors discovered.
You asked about grandad who’d been gone for years
And I tried to explain while I fought back the tears.
We went back in time on a magical journey.
As you laid there so still on the hospital gurney.
Back to a time with you, me, grandad and Jess
Back to a time when your mind wasn’t a mess.
Back to what you could remember, which was over five years ago.
But when we came back to present you wanted to know.
We’re you Ill? were poorly? would you go back home?
Was your hair looking scruffy? Where was your comb?
Why couldn’t you remember how you got here?
And what’s this buttony thing they’ve put by your ear?
All these questions you asked because you wanted to know.
Why it was that your mind was failing you so.
You needed to know why your mind wasn’t working.
But you see in that dark all the bad memories were lurking.
You couldn’t remember being Ill or living in a home.
But you could remember your bright green shiny gnome.
You couldn’t remember your fall or the pain.
But the memories of Christmas you could regain.
And though dementia it sucks when it wipes the mind clean
I’m grateful that to you some memories were unseen.
This memory of you it creeps in everyday,
Seeing you, my grandma, loose your mind this way.

Love you always
J.K




© 2019 JayKay


Author's Note

JayKay
Please ignore any spelling issues, I have checked it but sometimes you miss things (especially in an emotional write up) please can I have any feedback.

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Reviews

This poem is beautiful. Great way to describe what it feels like to miss someone. Be very proud of this poem.

Posted 4 Years Ago



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Added on November 26, 2019
Last Updated on November 26, 2019
Tags: Dementia, loss, memory

Author

JayKay
JayKay

Durham, North east , United Kingdom



About
I find poetry a great outlet for any feelings I have pent up and I enjoy both reading and writing it. I have no education last A level and didn’t take much of an interest in studying English l.. more..