This Love

This love I have is my torture, My crucible in the night, As I lie awake, too afraid to dream. It is the old shoe I wear, Once beautiful and a little tight; Then, worn but comfortable; Now, fetid and falling apart. The seams are rotten,  Insubstancial, yet, I'm unable to throw it away, This love I have, For I fear the next one  May not fit as well. This love I have  Is like nerves too long compressed; Now, alive again. With myriad little needles Digging under the skin, Excruciating. And though I know the pain leads to life I dispise it. I resent the numbness; Loath the awakening; Fear the throb That is this love I have, The appendage long without circulation. This love I have, Once comfortable in its silence, Has now reawakened to piercing sounds-. The armistice nullified; My heart, the battle grounds. This love I have will be A casualty of our war, And I will be left with an unmarked grave, Cold and empty, Lonely, As I mourn the uncertain future Without This love I once had.

Author's Note

An old write, on an even older topic

Reviews

[J Todd Underhill]

Fabulous write, and it is quite correct of love. That is why it becomes an addiction the cycle of love hate and back again. Well written poetess. I am glad I took the time to drop in on this piece. I would change nothing about this write at all.

[JayceeC]

J Todd. Stopping by your place had.me looking to see if there are others to be added to this collection.

[....................]

love the comparison of an old love to an old shoe, familiar, comfortable and perfectly fitting while the prospect of a new love brings with it the torment of the unfamiliar and unknown... old love can be debilitating, preventing us from really enjoying a new one... yet, such love rises and torments us to move forward while we cling to the old... I enjoyed this, Jan... well-done

[JayceeC]

Thanks, I have moved most of my older work to this site, but K Todd's post reminded me to check for others. That shoe analogy feels odd to some until they think about it. For women, new heals can be a painful experience too. The old while not shiny or exciting, may ha e as much or more to recommend it, though there could be a time when they just fall apart from abuse.

[....................]

So very true, Jan... there is nothing worse than breaking in new shoes...

[JayceeC]

Having to finally throw out those old ones. I really become fond of certain pairs. I'm getting better. I only have one pair p
Older than my kids..lol

[....................]

haha... that's progress