Because a very special lady isn't with me...but should be.
Awake
I woke, enveloped within the comfort only your warmth can bring My head was nestled into the curve of your shoulder,
my hand on velvet skin, stroking.
But you weren’t there.
Memory brought the scent of woman: gentle, and softly sated with pleasure
So warm with sleep, so twined with hints of passions past:
An ambiance of morning…a residue of night…a reason for joy and tears
But you weren’t there.
I woke with you gathered tightly around my being, comforting and exciting, both
at once.
I woke to memories and to desire, and to comfort, as my lips--of themselves--"sought
yours.
And then, you were there. But only for a moment:
In warmth
In passion
In comfort
In life
In all that matters.
But then, sadly, reality brought a sigh, and a turning inward And on waking, I wept.
I loved this piece! It's beautiful and longing and each interruption of the dream you feel the reality and disappointment that she isn't there but the dream makes her presence seem so real.. you feel her there. I totally get this! I manifest my intense daydreams all the time. Superb imagery!
Very good flow-- read many free verse poems, many came across as slightly choppy but each line you wrote flowed seamlessly into the next. That's one of the reasons why I really love the structure: like emotions, your lines fluctuated, and at a glance, it seemed chaotic; but there was a consistency within the chaos-- the repetition. It pulled together the irregular verses and gave flow. I also love how vivid the tone is... when I read it, I felt the frantic yearning, just a little out of control. Perfect. Then the realization gradually seeped in as the lines grew shorter and more numerous, until the cruel reality couldn't be ignored any longer. Finally ending the poem with a melancholy acquiescence, acceptance of the fact that it was a waking dream, no more...
This was beautiful, I'm glad I found this.
As someone who has recently lost someone they love, this hit home for me. I can relate deeply. The crave for human interaction and care comes from deep within and surrounds us everyday, this piece really dug deep with this idea.
Please, feel free to return the favour and give me feedback on my most recent piece.
Thank you.
That moment when all Your senses are sensitively awake... that moment when Your spirit is raising high, touching through the rising the energy of that beloved Soul... being caressed in each fiber of Your being with such amount of that mysterious power, of that most divine warmth, no words to express it... only to be felt, as Your words are deeply felt within my heart, I would give anything to feel this again... and it's not only the death what might dragged these words, separation comes in some others forms too.
I've been actively writing fiction for about 40 years and have been offered, and signed, 7 publishing contracts. I have a total of 29 novels available at booksellers at the moment. I've taught wri.. more..