On Maintaining an Uncongested Throne

Help for the modern toilet.

Three shots to the pot

Before you squat

Is a very strong suggestion.

 

It greases the way

And limits the stay

Of a most unpleasant congestion.

 

But should soaping fail

Don’t reach for the pail

The plunger’s under the sink.

 

A difficult task

It takes a good blast

But it does get rid of the stink.

Author's Note

For fun...to show that I'm not a poet, either.

Reviews

[AYVID N]

Pooping is a life saver. So its as important as anything else one does in life, if not more. So why not do it with a flair and elevate pooping to an art? I love this poem because its creative , In Your Face and better than those wishy washy routine love poems I write :)

[KWP]

Ha! I sent a read request to my friend Andrew because as soon as I read it I thought of him and his humour. I thought this kind of humour was an Aussie thing ... of course it is universal ...

I like your style
but not the stink
please take this soap
and clean the sink !!

Happy day to you X

[Raylene]

It's humorous first one of these I have seen and I have mixed feelings yet I do like it so good work dear

[Gee]

Like this, a wee bit of humour, rhyming and flowing sweetly, unlike the loo.

[SJ Mullins]

I think it is hilarious. It made me chuckle. :)

[Elmarie]

I found it amusing. :) a bit of tongue in cheek toilet humor never hurt anyone. I loved your war poem on your blog.

[Aswin R Prasad]

Most uncommon thing to write about.
And you're not. xD

[Cyndy Robinson]

I disagree. It expresses a clear thought. It has rhyme and rhythm which it doesn't have to, but shows more skill. I don't write short stories or books, but plan to. Sorry to say this shows more skill than those, lol. And I read stuff on here everyday by prolific writers, like 5 poems a day, that have less talent. I could read this and have a lot of fun with it. Its better than a lot on here. It may not have imagery which invokes strong feelings, but its fun. It does have form. And it is an expression of thought, maybe one you don't care for, but actually I like it. But I sort of have that sense of humor. Poetry is simply an expression of thought, whether you do it through prose, which I actually prefer, or in form. He did it in form. In my opinion prose is easier, have written both, but easier to write without all that stuff. ah, I don't ever discourage anyone, and truth to tell, because of the humor in the poem, and maybe the fact that I do performance poetry, I sort of really like this piece. No he couldn't probably get it published. Yes he could make it work for him. And he might even get it published at that. You can write the best piece of poetry in the world, publishers like short poetry. It fits that guideline. It might fit a space, lol.

[Aswin R Prasad]

Haha.. I agree with you on some of that. But I have my opinions and you have yours.
Let's learn to respect that. :)
Have a good day.

[Cyndy Robinson]

mmm, actually everything has its place in life. I do a lot of performance poetry. I could see a piece like this as the opener in a 10 or 15 minute reading. Its funny, it has a saving grace. One thing I am confused about is the use of the word congestion in the second stanza. I think your using it like traffic is congested, but think digestion is funnier.

[William Liston]

Ummmm...wow, you're really not a poet. Not much else I can say.

-William Liston