On Maintaining an Uncongested Throne

Help for the modern toilet.

Three shots to the pot

Before you squat

Is a very strong suggestion.

 

It greases the way

And limits the stay

Of a most unpleasant congestion.

 

But should soaping fail

Don’t reach for the pail

The plunger’s under the sink.

 

A difficult task

It takes a good blast

But it does get rid of the stink.

Author's Note

For fun...to show that I'm not a poet, either.

Reviews

[AYVID N]

Pooping is a life saver. So its as important as anything else one does in life, if not more. So why not do it with a flair and elevate pooping to an art? I love this poem because its creative , In Your Face and better than those wishy washy routine love poems I write :)

[Skib]

A brilliantly, witty and quirky piece. Thanks for the laugh :)

[Sami Khalil]

Awesome and funny. We need laughter and seriousness to digest and congest...:).............

[GypsyMoonCat]

I liked it, and I'm fussy, so I'd say you're a poet. Nicely descriptive in few short words. I shall remember this poem of yours next time things are a tad "congested" and reach for the plunger ...

[JoeM]

Bring back the 'long drop', they never block. Fill, yes, but who lives that long?

[Paul Bell]

Definitely shouldn't lunge when you take the plunge.
But you should plunge with a good lunge.

[M.A.]

This made me smile and laugh in a good way. It is short but to the point and it rolls off the tongue. The rhyming in this piece is also well written. I enjoyed this piece. Thank you for sharing.

[Valentine]

No, not a poet. We are on here to try to encourage all writers young and old. Many are very young and negative reviews discourage them. This sounded somewhat like a commercial I saw some time ago.

[JayG]

Writers write. You can't discourage them or talk them out of it, because it's what they ARE.

You encourage a writer by helping them write with more skill, not by praising bad habits. Not with praise sandwiches which wrap a valid critique in formulaic praise.

As the great Sol Stein said, "If I can talk you out of writing I've helped two people. I've saved you wasted nights typing, and helped the editor you would annoy with your submissions.

[William A. Wilson]

I do not have any criticism to give on this piece. I thought this was funny and well writen. I laughed right off the bat when I read the very first line "Three shots in the pot, before you squat".
Great rhyming, 100/100 from me.

[CaffeinatedMe]

Umm....Awsome? My grin slowly increased, until a most releaving chuckle helped end this witty piece.

[Kenny Bellamy]

I wish more writing did what this short poem does. People poo, our lives are disgusting more than they are angelic and writing so often omits or disintegrates the fullness of our lives, however mundane. What a lovely, disgusting, honest snapshot. Thank you, I would love nothing more than to read more!