Sad Goodbyes

note: this is not my suicide note: it was from a dream from long ago (or a nightmare depending on how you'd put it), and it's been in my journal for some time, just waiting for the day where i would h

I write this note because I've decided,
that this life I've life has been misguided.

I lost my wife and little child,
and still my pain has not been mild.

I have decided to ask the lord,
how much sadness he can afford

so in order for this act to take flight,
I have decided to give up the fight.

That is why you see me here,
upon the rope; I'm crystal clear.

because of sadness I did not die,
so to my family; don't start to cry.

I know dear mother you cannot abide,
and I do not ask for it to be applied.

Dear sister look after our mother so frail,
don't let her get back into addiction for ale.

Dear brother, don't fret, for you need to be strong,
I need you to push all their sadness along.

To you all I do indeed ask for pardon,
but this is for science, I need access to HIS Garden.

Maybe I'll see papa, and ask for his blessing,
instead of when I was young with my knowledge oppressing.

but now it's the time for one last goodbye,
the kingdom of heaven will soon be nearby.