Waves of Moonlit Waters

Akin was my childhood to the waves of moonlit waters;

beautiful.

Faultless therefore blameless and seemingly pristine, 

'twas usual for me to seem free

My appearance provided many with envious admiration and joy;

like the waves,

inducing a memory within a memory from a time passed;

Memories of young age.

This remained so, and for quite some time;

I supposed the world mine.

Like the waters of Earth, I had recieved constant light;

misleading.

It varied, one moment dim, next moment bright,

for just like the waters, inside me was life.

My youthful mind and innocence eventually brought me pain;

dissatisfied,

I could have swore that life was more;

my childhood now a lie

Now that I'm forced to comform while living a life of lies;

like all of you,

I feel cheated and decieted;

death our only prize

Today my appearance provides most with a sense of misery;

for I am racing time,

The oldest I've ever been, the youngest I'll ever be;

until the day I die.

Unlike the waves, us humans are of nothing as prestine.

Unlike the sharks, we bring great harm and all bad in between.

Unlike the sun, is the moon, and unlike the moon, the sun;

Unlike the sunlight, is the moonlight; yet somehow light is one.

Among our differences are similarities so I expected some unity;

misleading.

For we are not one, but one of a kind;

Destruction-mankind's thing.

Like the diverse creatures, (living under the sea)

the waves remain above us; 

Beauty and love is above you and me.

(not worthy)

Reviews

[winter;lyra]

if this is really your first poem i have to congratulate you, you have a mind for it, honestly good job, as the meaning of the poem, seems to me as some kind of growth from childhood to adult, however it feels like he failed to abandon his childhood self and this childhood self entered in conflict with this new life he's being presented to and this self morphed into something else that is neither a child or an adult, what follows seems to be his vision on the world he can't comprehend or accept, or, in better words, the reflection on the word he wanted?

[Shae-Leigh Johns]

I love this piece so much. I likethe message behind it too. :)

[Gaia Octavia]

This piece serves as an open window to a soul. A glass pressed to the door of another's mind, echoing its most personal thoughts on life. But mostly, it is a piece of beautiful reflection. Not unlike the sparkling sun - caught only for a moment - within the waves; where the constance of change occurs at a frightening speed. Extremely well done. I look forward to reading more.

[Jessalynn]

This is absolutely beautiful. I had to go back and read it twice more! Lovey words, great rhythm, all around amazing piece.

[Ja Strangelyn]

This is beautifully written and I could feel the emotion as if this was about me. And your words are true; childhood is beautiful, adulthood is not. I was just thinking on this yesterday and how I miss the innocence of being young and carefree. Wonderfully done. :)

[I Am Svetlana]

It's as if you're talking to yourself...or as I read it, you're speaking to the gravestone of your younger self. It's sad how some children feel cheated from their youth, but you shouldn't make that your future. Every day is a new day, start off with a clean slate. Take things slow and don't accept defeat. We all have our bad days, I've sure as hell been through a great deal of mine, but hey, each day, I am doing my best to make each day better. To make myself shine and not doubt who I am. The world deserves to see you shine, to be taught that you can handle anything life throws at you.

[Alias]

This is really fantastic, I don't know what to comment on because you've talked about so much. I feel like this poem is the sort of conversation you have totally drunk lying on the grass and looking up at the stars, it's deep and informed, but aware of insignificance. It's nostalgic and personal yet universal. Really good write.

[Leon C]

I'm not a poet so I can't comment on structure or the like.

However, as a reader I enjoyed the dreamy quality you words bring. You use nice imagery to increase the state.
I did find the dreamy quality also made it hard to follow in places. This is probably my fault as poetry is not my thing but you wanted comments good, bad and indifferent :-)

[Rashi Jain]

This is so beautiful. It expresses everything you feel. I enjoyed reading it. And the ending-Beauty and love is above you and me.
(not worthy)
perfect.

[The Fallen King]

Awesome poetry. Keep it up you inspired me.

[Tessa Danielle Guise]

I really liked your poem. If you just started. I would love to tell you that this poem could win a contest on here. keep up the good work. If you write more and more. you could become a very famous writer.. I loved this poem myself. I have marked it to my favorites.

Good Luck and Keep writing!!