Chapter Five

Chapter Five.

 

 

Missy McMicky is the prettiest piratess that Cabin Boy has ever seen. That is hardly surprising, though, as she is the only piratess he has ever seen. Still, he doubts few come prettier.

“Now, what can Missy help ye with, lad?”

“The captain’s undies are missing,” he says.

“Captain Jigswiggle’s lost his underpants? And ye climb the riggin’ to tell Missy? Matey, Missy is the wrong - ”

“I mean the undies that were Queen Anne’s.”

“Annie’s undies? Missing?” Missy looks rather grim. “Yer sure of this, lad?” she finally says.

Cabin Boy nods meekly. For a moment, it looks like he is in for a scolding, but the look quickly passes from Missy’s face. “Lad, what made ye come and ask Missy?”

“I thought perhaps the bloomers got mixed up amongst the laundry, and that they had been returned to you by mistake.”

“Ye really think Missy wears fancy pants like them undies? Lad, Missy wants her backside to sit easy in her breeches. Them undies would be all bunched up about Missy’s bum.”

Cabin Boy feels his cheeks warm. Discussing Queen Anne’s underwear was one thing, but he did not feel comfortable discussing what Missy wears under her breeches.

Missy laughs. “Aw, lad, did Missy make ye blush?”

Cabin Boy is unsure of what to say. He looks down at his feet, making sure his eyes do not stray towards the edge of the platform. He does not wish to know how the deck appears from this height.

Missy leans over the edge of the platform and launches a wad of spittle from her mouth. She may be pretty, Cabin Boy decides, but she is still every inch a pirate. He hopes nobody is walking on the deck below Crow’s Nest 2-A. “Lad, if ye be thinkin’ that Annie’s Undies were mixed about with the laundry, ye had best talk to the man who washes it.”

It was not what Cabin Boy was hoping to hear, but it made sense. It seems he should seek out the cook, for the cook is responsible for making sure the clothes and bedding are kept clean. He may be a pirate, but Captain Jigswiggle does not abide a smelly crew.

As he slowly makes his way down the ladder, Cabin Boy is careful not to look down.