The Point

The Point

A Poem by J.R Schlievert
"

enjoy

"
Point the finger to save your self
Point the finger to help one another
Make trouble for oneself
Or help a surrogate mother


Point the finger
Sare and linger
Help your self
Or eachother


Sink or swim
Do or die
Help the weak
Find their battle cry


The point can help
The point could sin
The point i delt
No one will win


Whats the point
As i conceal a facade
Thats the point
The point by God

© 2009 J.R Schlievert


Author's Note

J.R Schlievert
my first poem that rhymes! haha tell me what you think, and tell me if you like this or my other poems :) and thank you for reading!

My Review

Would you like to review this Poem?
Login | Register




Reviews

Amazing poem and idea! People have the choice of helping themselves and leaving others to drown or risking their own to save each other. Beautifully written and constructed

Posted 15 Years Ago


The message is perfectly carried out, you did great with this! It is harder than poeple think to get words to rhyme right, just let the poem be what it choses, then it will be great!

Posted 15 Years Ago


I like the theme of this one, it jives well. You should try expanding it a bit, take one of the angles of the poem and run with it. Like the bit about a surrogate mother, now there could be an interest point of extrapolation. Either way, a good solid poem all around.

Posted 15 Years Ago


lol, what's the point
great poem this one. I liked the 'point' lol
keep up the good writes!!!!
~Domo~

Posted 15 Years Ago


Hmmm this one is interesting (in a good way), your poems make me think and visualize and that's what everyone looks for, so you're doing great! This one makes me think the most, and I agree with Lizanne Green "people do need instructions on when and how to point the finger." It's hard for me to write down exactly how I think of this poem but it's fantastic, I needed a great poem that keeps me thinking; it's one of the things I look for. :)

Posted 15 Years Ago


This is really good and the message is great! Odd but some people do need instructions on when and how to point the finger. You did so good in conveying this "point." Keep that pen moving. It is working well for you! I enjoyed this rhyming poem. As your first, it predicts the good things to come.

Posted 15 Years Ago



Share This
Email
Facebook
Twitter
Request Read Request
Add to Library My Library
Subscribe Subscribe


Stats

245 Views
6 Reviews
Rating
Added on September 3, 2009

Author

J.R Schlievert
J.R Schlievert

Queen Creak, AZ



About
If a fun loving person! Need help with anything just give me a message and I promise that I will get to you! Im a big guy at 65 (AAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!! THAT RHYMED!) and I love people! And what ever they .. more..

Writing

Related Writing

People who liked this story also liked..