Torn apart in Thailand

Torn apart in Thailand

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Tracey was lying on the blue sun lounger, with her new fluffy pink towel she had bought for her vacation. This was a dream come true, a trip of a lifetime to Phuket. She laid there thinking of her lover who was swimming in the ocean. The Andaman Sea was beckoning her to get in, the waves breaking against the rocks, the turquoise waters rippling. Tracey, however, lay back down again. Her thoughts were taken back to only a week ago.

What was she doing? Tracey had broken up with Pete on his 40^th Birthday on 19 March. She couldn’t take the lies anymore. Their romance was a true whirlwind. They had met on an internet dating site. Tracey had been single for 3 years, well, apart from a couple of flings, which weren’t even worth thinking about. Her friend had spotted Pete on line and insisted she contact him. The birth signs were right, so Diana had said. Tracey a Cancerian, Pete, Piscian. A perfect match she had said. Tracey was getting fed up of being alone, so her friend’s suggestion was easily taken. Pete answered within minutes. He was a dream come true. So good looking, in fact Diana, fancied him herself, but she was already taken. Deep brown eyes, and a gorgeous smile. They didn’t have a lot in common, but lust took over.

Tracey called him when she finished work that evening at 10 o’clock. “How do you fancy going for a drink?  “I’ve just come in and have taken off my jeans” came the response from this very sexy voice. “Well for the first date, would you mind putting them on Pete, and I’ll meet you at the pub at the bottom of your street in 10 minutes”. They both burst out laughing, this had certainly broken the ice. Tracey pulled up in her Audi 4 10 minutes later, as Pete was walking towards the pub. Their eyes made contact, smiles beamed from each of them, and they walked up to each other with a peck on both cheeks. Pete was dressed very casually with a pair of faded blue jeans, with a rip in the knee. Tracey was wearing a delicate colour of pink blouse, and white three quarter length trousers. Her blonde hair tousled in the wind. There were sparks immediately. They walked over to the pub on the corner of the street, and Pete chose a quiet table in the corner. Passion was in the air, they were touching each other’s hands, stroking each other’s legs. The sexual tension was pretty electric. After a couple of hours, Tracey reluctantly said she needed to go home to as she had to get up early in the morning. Pete had wanted her to stay the night, he was blown away by this stunning beauty before him. He thought he was dreaming. Tracey did too, but thought it a little forward to sleep with him on the first date. At least 6 dates, she had told him. Pete had laughed, and said, yea, we’ll see.

The following day, they met up again twice. They were desperate to be together, and Tracey gave in to her emotions that evening. The passion was electric. The attraction was so powerful between them. They fell in lust with each other immediately. One month later, they moved in together into a beautiful house in a village just five minutes drive to the sea. Life in Cyprus couldn’t get any better. Tracey was in heaven. She adored Pete so much, and they fell so deeply in love very quickly. They had an enviable life. Both had good jobs, earning reasonable money and had a great circle of friends.

On Christmas Eve Tracey persuaded Pete to take a vacation. Their dream destination was Thailand. They had talked about going on several occasions. Heck, they had saved hard. Tracey’s philosophy was live life to the full. Tracey, being very analytical and thorough, chose the resort and went through every detail with Pete. Well, Pete was so laid back. He would have been quite happy backpacking, and Tracey enjoyed the more luxurious things in life. Tracey got her way, and booked a three week vacation in the April for them in a luxury villa in a really up market resort in Karon Beach on Phuket.  

April came around real quick. Life at home wasn’t too good though. Pete had started drinking really heavily over the months, which concerned Tracey. In fact she took him to the Doctors twice. He was an alcoholic, but would he admit it? NO! This brought horrific memories back to her..her Father had died an alcoholic the summer before. This was so raw to Tracey. Her Mother had died just under five years ago of the same. Now, watching her partner going down the same road was breaking her heart. She was going through the same as she did with her parents for most of her life. Why was she attracted to this wonderful man, with such an awful illness? Why? She asked herself this question often. Several times a week all she seemed to do was pick him up from some bar down town, kicking and screaming, as he didn’t know when to stop. It was a constant battle with Pete. He just couldn’t go out for one or two drinks, oh no, it was like a drinking marathon! How many drinks could he consume until Tracey arrived to drag him into the car. Then when she did get him home, he still wanted more to drink. She was really living an existence, not a life. She was becoming so miserable.

Tracey sat up and gazed out to the ocean. Pete was bobbing about in the waves, chatting to a young couple. How handsome he looks, she thought. How sexy, oh, how she wanted to go back to the hotel and make love with him right then and there.  Love making was one thing she really enjoyed in their volatile relationship. She got up from the sun lounger, and ran to the shore line, the sand was so hot it was burning her feet.

“Pete” she called. He looked up, with his most amazing smile, and Tracey swam over to him. “Let’s go back to the hotel”, she whispered in his ear, and held his hand under the water. Pete quickly said his goodbyes to the young couple, and Tracey and Pete swam back inshore.

Within 10 minutes they were back in their stunningly beautiful villa, set in lush gardens. They threw their stuff on the floor, and Tracey took Pete by the hand into the bathroom. They took a long shower together, and made really passionate love.  If only life could be like this all the time, Tracey thought.

Later that afternoon they went out for dinner to a lovely restaurant they had found, which served homemade pizza, which they cooked in front of you. Pete ordered a drink straight away and ordered beer after beer. Then came the wine, and more wine. Tracey’s patience was wearing thin, but no matter what she said he would still drink. The decided to go to a little Thai bar they went to everyday for a couple of drinks on the way back to the villa. Pete, being Pete, was necking his drinks as if he was dying of thirst, and would never see another drink again. She had had enough by 9.30 p.m. and said she was going back. He said he wouldn’t be long, yea, right she thought. He had said that all holiday and came back in the early hours of the morning most nights, leaving Tracey alone watching TV.

Well, this particular night, Tracey was woken at 3 a.m. by Pete banging on the door to get into the villa, ranting and raving. She let me in, and after 20 minutes of arguing, she eventually persuaded him to go to bed. At 6 a.m. she was woken up, sweating buckets. As she looked around, she saw Pete on the balcony with a large bottle of red wine, which was almost finished, the air conditioning and fans were switched off.  Tracey got up, checked on Pete, who was asleep in a chair, and she took a shower and went to breakfast alone. When she came back, he was standing ready. She knew his next plan..straight to the bar. Yes, and that’s what he did, leaving her alone again. Tracey wanted to hang by the pool anyways today. In the late afternoon she looked up from her swim, and saw Pete staggering over to the pool area. He was so drunk, he didn’t even notice her. She calmly got out of the pool, went back to the villa, and took a shower. Tracey went into the safe, took out her passport, flight details and credit card, and headed to the hotel internet area. After an hour she had cancelled her flight which she was due to get 2 weeks later, and was booked on to the next flight out of Phuket airport that night.

 She went back to the villa, to find he was inside and had locked the doors from inside. After assistance from the security guards, they broke into the room. Pete was out for the count on top of the bed, semi naked. Tracey was on a mission. She had 45 minutes to pack all her things, shower and be in a taxi. She was ready on time, and left him a note “Pete, when you awake, I will be gone. Gone from Thailand, and gone from your life. I will on my way home. You take care. I love you, I just can’t be with you anymore. xxx”  

Tracey headed to the airport and she cried all the way there, and then cried again on the flight to Bangkok. Tears of grief, and tears relief. It was a pretty long journey back. She had to then take another flight to Abu Dhabi, then on to Larnaca. She didn’t sleep at all the whole way back. She felt so many emotions that of anger, worry for Pete and his wellbeing, grief and utter sadness. Tracey had eventually ended their 18 month relationship. It took a lot of courage to walk away, however, she knew she was doing the right thing. When she arrived back at their home, she packed up her car with as many belongings as she could pack in, and drove back to her house in Paphos where she used to live previously.

That was the end..the end of a very volatile and emotional relationship, one which destroyed Tracey’s self esteem and confidence really badly. Never again, never again will she ever date someone with a drink problem. It broke her heart to walk away, but she knew in her heart it was the best thing she was to do.

Now she is at peace in herself.

Reviews

[Warrior]

Great story telling. This did justice in the realm of getting the message across. Great message. There's lot of times where a story can have a great message to aim for, and have a lot of under lining things but then no one gets it, and if no one gets it, then the point has failed. But in my opinion this did well to get the message across. You made it clear, which is why I think it's good. Keep up the good work. What was also great was that I could imagine the story as I read it, and that is also a strong point of stories. The ability to have the reader imagine it because after all we're reading not watching it, but it was as if I was there as I read this, and that is great. Good job once again.

[y&r]

This is amazing. I actually read every single word of it, which is extremely rare. The whole story is going at the right pace, and the best thing is that you jumped straight into the conflict. Just one thing. After the first few paragraphs when Tracey flashed back, I don't know when the flashback stops and we return to the present. Perhaps just tidy this part up.

Oh, and there were few distracting grammar errors:
"He said he wouldn’t be long, yea, right she thought." that is a terribly run on sentence.
"She let me in, and after 20 minutes of arguing, she eventually persuaded him to go to bed." She let ME in? I think you mean: she let HIM in.

Otherwise, awesome job!

[DESTROYA]

i found this very interesting. I like the fact that you simplified a long stretch of time and also that you said things far more directly than most. i would love to hear maybe just a bit of dialogue from the characters.

[TheSweet]

Okay well. First of all 'She let me in, and' i think should be 'him' and not me. Secondly, this seems like an overview piece which does work for the short story piece. The problem with this mainly being that it moves on so quickly it's hard to get the image of much things happening and as a result misses emotive language which would otherwise cause more empathy.

The paragraph explaining her mum and dad who were alcoholics i think could be re-written to imapct a lot more. Your style of writing is mostly clear but it just seems a little distant - and I have no problem with the story - it's simple and has a point and lead.

I think the main thing this needs is an editing re-write. Which is as simple as looking over the whole story and rewording every sentence or point into a more impacting and interesting structure. That's not to say this is bad, it just could be improved in my opinion.

You do have a couple of subtle metaphors and rhymes which really add a little something to the point - but I just think you could add things like this more to make it more exciting and leave people thinking it's clever and questioning meanings.

I also think it might be good to cut off the ending line - this leaves people interested and intreagued. Which even though they might be a little annoied that they don't know what happens next, what happened to the guy and if she moved on with someone else - at least you know you've invoked that interest and emotion as a writer :)

Also, I don't think eighteen months is overly serious - they will be able to move on after time, which gives this piece a much more down to earth feel which I enjoyed :) Thanks for sharing!

[Tate Morgan]

A great synopsis to a story .I would like to hear from the characters of it

[SweetRainDrops]

Wonderful. Simply wonderful. I can't. Ever put words to describe my feelings.

[KAREN]

Sad, but this happens way to many times. I know all to well what drinking does to a marriage and a family. excellent write!

[M Garcia]

Sad and interesting. Keep writing. Grammar mistakes, but it doesn't, in my opinion, distract from the story.

[PyroKitty24]

How interesting. It was an enjoyable read, and unfortunately about something that happens quite often. It had a few grammar mistakes, but it was still able to be understood.