The Ghost of Ruby Sloan

A quick little ghost story.

She only comes once a year

To the same small town

Filling the locals with fear.

They said her name was Ruby Sloan,

Named by her mother,

After her favorite stone.

 

She was a witch, but not by choice

Created by a man named Jacob Boyce.

Who came one day and stole her heart

And swore forever they would never part.

He left her cold, standing in the rain.

Teary eyed and showing her shame.

 

With nowhere to go, no family to see

She walked into the ocean and let her spirit free.

But her soul didn’t die on that winter's day,

It floats on the waves, or so they all say.

And once a year on the day that she died

Her spirit haunts and you can hear her cry.

 

It’s been a hundred years or maybe more

And that small little town built on the shore

Still locks up tight and no one comes out

When Ruby Sloan is stalking about.

All through the night you hear her shrill voice

Seeking revenge on Jacob Boyce.

Author's Note

Thanks for reading if you have any feedback I would love to hear it.

Reviews

[Woody]

I love ghost stories almost as much as I love humourous writes. this one's got all the hallmarks of a great write. brings to mind Poe and King. a very good one, James.
possibly a little tense mistake. "it floats on the waves". shouldn't it be floated? or maybe that would mess up your syllable count? anyway, I wouldn't know. I'm no poet.

[James]

Her spirit still floats on the waves, except on that one day of the year. "Not a poet" listen to you? I've read your poetry my friend, where do you think I get my inspiration? really, though, I'm thrilled you liked it.

[Woody]

yep, I see it now. silly me! it's the missing "still" that threw me.
thank you very much for your vote of confidence. I keep trying and I'm constantly learning from poets like you, James.

[Kathy Van Kurin]

'The Ghost of Ruby Sloan'
James,
How many little towns through the ages have had these legends? People identify with other's pain and transfer there empathy and creativity into getting all fired up with fear. It only takes one or two people claiming they heard this or saw that to start these scary and sad stories. I loved reading yours and it was enjoyable to read a well written tale with description and reality.
Kathy

[J Todd Underhill]

Ghost stories in the form of poetics... I love it! I like the rhyming and the words captivate the mind. I would not suggest any edits at all!

[barleygirl]

Nice depiction of this ghost & her backstory, using well-crafted rhyme & rhythm thru-out, that lends itself to this type of storytelling poem. Not crazy about the repetition of Ruby's name in the first stanza. This line doesn't do the story justice: "She walked to the ocean and let it all go." I'd rather have a little more drama at this point. Otherwise the story flows well & wraps up perfectly.

[James]

Thanks for the constructive criticism, I'm already thinking of ways to fix it.
How about "They said her name was Ruby Sloan." I will have to think about the other a little longer.

[barleygirl]

Looks better already! Thanks for considering my suggestions.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

very pleasant, made me think of the 1944 movie "the Uninvited" at the beginning when they showed the ocean and Ray Milland was doing a narrative about ghosts in general....this is a really good story...i got chills reading it..so guess it works..:)

[James]

Thanks, Jacob for your wonderful compliment I'm glad you liked it. I like old movies as well, going to have to look this one up.