the wolf (edited version)

The Wolf

Sprinting through the woods, he saw nothing but trees. The gap between him and the beast was shrinking quickly. He could hear its claws tearing apart the ground behind him. I need to find a place to hide, he thought. He had only seen trees whilst running; their dark shadowy figures like hands trying reach up and grab his bleeding feet, destroy his chances of escape. Suddenly, he could no longer hear the thud of paws. He stopped and turned around accepting the fact that he would never outrun this beast. All was lost. He examined the empty space before him, but no matter how hard he looked he could not see the wolf.

“What the hell? Where are you?” he demanded.

“I am everywhere,” croaked a sinister voice.

The force of the impact flung him across the dirt. There he lay, on his back while the beast stepped toward him. Up close, he could see it with ease. It had teeth that glistened like the stars above his head, and fur as black as ink. It had limbs longer than the branches of a thousand-year-old oak and claws sharper than knives. When he saw its hollow blood red eyes, he could feel the venom and rage of the beast flowing through him.  He knew the end was near. The beast was almost upon him. “What are you?” he choked.  “I pity you,” came the reply. “You have eyes, yet you cannot see. I am part of you! Your own flesh and blood! My brother, you are no longer a man. You are a corpse!” With those words, the beast bolted towards him. Its teeth sank into his neck . Death grasped him in an icy embrace.

Raeger screamed as he shot up like a lightning bolt out of the wool mattress under him. He instinctively grabbed his throat, expecting crimson blood to flow past his hands. Raeger cursed under his breath before uttering a quick prayer to Zra’kael, thanking him for clean hands and a wholesome neck. This time the nightmare had been so vivid, so real. He shook his head and tried to erase the dream from his thoughts.

  It was First Light when Rager had woken, but after praying to Zra’kael, the sky filled with the radiance of the sun. Everything was okay in the village. Raeger possessed qualities that were very rare amongst his people. His eyes were the color of ice, and he had hair as dark as that of a raven.  He had olive skin that had not changed from the moment he was born.  Most of the men in his village had chestnut hair, and were born with skin as white as the moon. Their eyes were either the color of emeralds or cinnamon. It was the day of his birth that the village recognized a difference between him and the others. Not because of his physical traits but rather of his voice. He did not cry like the other newborns. Instead, he howled like a lupine wolf. This should have guaranteed Raeger’s death, but the Shaman of his people proclaimed him the savior not the bearer of misfortune. As a young boy, both his father and brother were murdered in the war between Ki’thouri and Farken. He watched in horror as his own mother was brutally impaled with a Farken spear. The man who murdered her, however, did not live long after that. Raeger’s rage took control and everything faded. He awoke only after the invasion and was told they had won.  The village elders said they witnessed his savagery in battle. Savagery? He did not remember. They said it was best Raeger did not know what he did to the man. Thinking back on what he could have done, his blood ran cold even on a day as bright and warm as this one.

“What could I have possibly done?” Raeger muttered.

“Brakon, is something troubling you?” asked Hargoth with concern

“Nothing. I was just daydreaming,” he replied.

“I suppose we should go hunting?”

“Yes, find your weapons and meet me at the entrance of the village.”

“Ok”

Raeger walked through the village moving toward the entrance. On his way he saw some of the village children laughing and playing with sticks. They were playing hunter, a game Raeger remembered playing when he was young. Each one took turns being hunter and pretended to kill the imaginary beasts. Enticing aromas rose up from the clay and spur huts and Raeger realized that he had not eaten this morning. No matter, he thought, I will catch something while hunting.

“Hurry up, Brakon!” yelled Hargoth

“How did you get there so fast?”

“I ran.”

 “Figured as much.”

As Hargoth and Raeger left the village, Raeger felt a heavy amount of dread build up in his brain. He looked over at Hargoth to see if he had noticed, and thankfully he hadn’t. He couldn’t be bothered answering any more questions, for he was concentrating on the hunt. They scanned the woods for hours searching for prey, but there was not a sound to be heard from the forest. They did not talk, fearing that they would scare off any would-be prey, but the silence between them was not empty. Suddenly the call of a Larou-bird sounded. Its red and black feathers looked ruffled, and its blue beak was cracked. Raeger, being the more experienced hunter, motioned for Hargoth to lay down and stay still. He carefully removed his bow from his back, took an arrow from his quiver and aimed at the bird. Just as he released his arrow a dark blur leapt and snatched the bird off of its perch. He proceeded alone toward the shape while drawing out an obsidian hunting knife from his pocket. The dark blade glistened in the mid-day light. Raeger stopped dead in his tracks when he recognized the shape. It was the beast from his nightmares. Time seemed to slow down as he dropped the knife. The beast turned it’s head towards Raeger, rising onto its haunches. He could see it was a wolf man, something only spoken of in legends.  He ran backwards and slammed into Hargoth.

“MOVE!!”

The beast was lunging after him on all fours. Hargoth was nowhere in his field of vision. The sun had begun its descent in the horizon. It wasn’t a dream, he realized, it was a vision. His legs were burning and his breath was coming out in rough gasps. Then, just like he saw in his vision, the thuds of paws stopped. With caution he turned around. He thought he knew what came next, but this time the beast was still there standing on its hind legs. It let out a howl of victory, as it had succeeded in capturing its prey. It slowly walked up to him, letting out a deep growl. The Earth had nearly devoured the sun - only a few rays were still able to illuminate his surroundings. Raeger instinctively reached for his knife, even though he knew he had no hope. He had dropped it when he had seen the beast. He was vulnerable. It raked its caws across one of the trees. Four bright yellow gashes were left and they were oozing a sticky yellow sap. Raeger braced himself for the attack.  He said a final prayer to Zra’kael. 

“WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR!!!?? KILL ME!!!” he yelled

The beast leapt and slammed itself into his abdomen, knocking the breath out of him. Just like in his vision, time seemed to slow down. He could see the features of the beast. He could see its blood red eyes and its gleaming white fangs, although he ferocity in its eyes seemed dulled this time. Raeger closed his eyes, waiting for the fangs to close around his throat. He hit the ground. He could feel the beast’s labored rancid breath washing over his face. Then he felt an agonizing pain that penetrated through his flesh, straight down to the surface of his bone. Then he felt nothing. The beast had left Raeger alone to die the worst kind of death �" slow and painful. The throb of the bite overwhelmed him, but he couldn’t scream. It was as if Raeger’s throat had been closed up by some unnatural force. There he lay, for how long he could not tell. Just as he began to surrender and slip under, he heard a voice calling his name in the distance.

Raeger woke up in what he recognized as the hut of the elders. Sweet, pungent aromas assaulted his nostrils. He could hear chanting. His eyes took some time to adjust to the dim candlelight. He reached up to touch his shoulder and noticed a tight piece of gauze wrapped around his arm. Suddenly the pain filled his body. The memories came back to him and he screamed in pain.

Over the next few days Raeger started to regain his strength. He got faster, his vision improved, and he could hear the song of the Laruo all the way across the village. Raeger never told anyone about the beast because he feared that they would brand him a monster. He told them that he barely escaped a bear attack. Hargoth wasn’t able to deny this, seeing as he was only able to see a black blur chasing his friend, but that didn’t mean that he wasn’t suspicious.

“I have duty to fulfill. I must go back,” he said to himself.

Raeger had been given blade made of hard rock. Its shiny grey edge gleamed in the light of day. The elders had bestowed it upon him as his survival showed the signs of a true warrior. Although it was a great honor, Raeger felt he needed to prove himself in battle before accepting such a gift. It was not easy to create, as it could not be shaped without fire. He had also received an oak bow. He decided to keep it, as his bow had snapped in half when he was tackled. He departed the village to hunt; winter was coming and food was scarce. He searched the forest for prey. Raeger approached a cave deep in the woods.  He saw a man clothed in nothing more than a mere animal hide cloak.  His body bore the scars of a warrior. He looked as though he was still in the prime of his youth. Raeger saw that he resembled him somehow. They had the same raven black hair and olive skin, except this man had eyes the color of crimson.

“Who are you?” asked Raeger.

“I pity you. You have eyes, yet you cannot see” began the man,

Raeger stopped breathing, eyes wide.

“I am part of you. Your own flesh and blood. I am no longer a man, I am a corpse” finished Raeger unintentionally. He covered his mouth.

A smirk crept over the man’s scarred face.

“Come, brother, there is much for me to show you,”

“Answer my question! If you really are my brother then what is your name?”

“I am Lycraon.”

That wasn’t his name. Well not his real name anyway. The name he spoke was the nickname Raeger had given to him. It meant wolf. Raeger gave his brother that nickname because it suited him: a lone, strong hunter. No one knew the nickname outside of his family. The sudden revelation caused Raeger to run to his brother. Raeger said,

“Brother. Tell me what happened to you. Why do you reside in the forest?”

‘”Sit down, Raeger. There is much to tell you.  First let me tell you the history of our family. We are descendants from a man named Lucien. He was the first of our blood to bear the curse-,”

“What curse?”

  “You don’t know about the curse of the wolf? Every 1st born in every 4^th generation of our family bears a certain mark on our bodies in the shape of a claw and fang. This mark causes us to transform into a wolf when we are angered.”

“You still haven’t said why you live here rather than in the village.”

“I reside in the forest, because I was banished by our elders.  Many years ago I fought in the battle with the Farkens. You were 8 years of age. Father and I fought. During the battle I saw our father run through with a spear. My anger boiled over as I saw red. Then I began to feel a pain I had never felt before, my bones shattered into pieces, and my muscles stretched and grew. My teeth burned. The agony consumed me, made me a killing machine fueled by rage alone. I could see myself, Raeger, tearing apart enemy and friend alike. Bodies lay all over the battlefield; the Farken begged for mercy. My blood lust grew, and they spoke the language of men, a tongue I could not understand. After the battle they banished me to the forests, where I have been living for all these years.”

“It was you that hunted me down all those weeks ago”

“Forgive me, brother. I lost control. Thank Zra’kael that I was able to contain the beast long enough to keep you alive. Raeger, there is something else too. When you were bitten, the curse possessed you,”

“What does that mean?’

“You are like me. Stay with me, brother. I will teach you how to live, how to control it,”

“You are mad! I cannot stay, Lycraon!”

“Fine. Find me when you have accepted the truth. Until then you will be subject to its power, and everyone you hold dear to your heart will be at risk,”

Raeger raced through the forest. He could feel heart pounding against his ribs. So many thoughts were taking over his mind. Did he black out during the battle because of his cursed brother? Was the same curse flowing through his blood? Why hadn’t he been banished like his brother? He stopped running for a moment to gaze at the sky. His frustration took control of his mind. It opened something within him, something that had never been opened before. It was an all devouring rage.

The rage consumed him. He began to feel the pain Lycraon described. It was completely consuming. His bones shattered and morphed into new shapes. His muscles burned as they extended and grew to cover his new skeletal structure. Raeger screamed in agony, but instead he howled, sounding more like an animal than a human. Jet-black fur erupted from his pores, transforming him into a beast like Lycraon. The only human quality Raeger had left was his ice blue eyes, in which a deep hatred burned. The pain had burned away all of his humanity, leaving only a primitive rage. It was controlling him and engraving only one thought into his brain �" KILL. Raeger could smell an animal close by. Without another thought, he sprinted on all fours, leaving a path of destruction behind him. The cool air felt good whipping through his fur. Raeger heard the deer before he saw it and stopped several yards away. The lust for blood and flesh filled him, for he could now smell his prey. The sweet tantalizing scent caused his mouth to water. He was downwind from the deer, meaning that the deer would not smell him. He stalked his prey, slowly closing the distance between them. When he was just arms length away, his muscles coiled in anticipation. The deer was right in front of him. NOW, the thought resonated like a thousand symphonies. He pounced on the deer and it let out a small yelp. Then it was all over. He steadily devoured the deer, its blood slowly dripping from his teeth. He had never tasted anything more delicious. With his hunger satisfied, he climbed into a nearby outcropping. The rocky overhang providing shade for his new body and he fell into a deep undisturbed slumber.

When Raeger awoke it was almost dawn. He was already human again, but his body was drenched in the blood of the deer. He remembered everything as dread filled his heart. His brother’s words had entered into his thoughts. “Find me when you have accepted the truth. Until then you will be subjected to its power.”  Raeger knew he needed to go back. I need to learn how to control this curse. Everybody I care about is at risk. He found a stream close to the overhang. He waded in and scrubbed off the dried blood. The cold water felt good on his skin. Raeger wandered back to where he first transformed. With each step, his muscled screamed in agony. After some time he made it back to where he lost his humanity. His bow was still intact, but his quiver strap was completely destroyed. His clothes were torn apart but were still usable. Raeger ran back to where the deer was slaughtered. It hurt less when he ran, but he would not stop. He saw the remnants of the deer and used his knife to cut the hide and used his remaining cloth scraps, to create clothing for himself. After that, he made his way back to the village. The first person to see him was Hargoth.

“Where the hell have you been, Raeger? And why do you smell so bad?” he asked.

“I apologize, Hargoth. I was hunting and I wandered a bit too far, so I spent the night in the woods.”

“You had me worried,” said Hargoth, “It is unsafe to sleep in those woods alone.”

“You can see that I am well, Brakon, I just need to sleep.”

“Okay, my friend.”

Raeger walked to his home. He was extremely fatigued when he entered his hut and his bed looked inviting. He fell on to the mattress and immediately fell asleep. He woke up the next day determined to find Lycraon. He knew he had to learn to control the curse.

Raeger left the village and found his brother deep in the woods. Lycraon taught him ways of suppressing his anger. The training was long and arduous, and at some points his rage nearly consumed him, allowing the wolf to surface, but his brother was able to subdue the wolf before he could fully turn.  Raeger was spending more time away from the village every day. Sometimes he left for days on end, but returned with much meat. He never told anyone where he was going, nor did they ask him where he went. Food was food and it didn’t matter where it came from. He appeared angrier, less friendly. Raeger still cared for his people, but he feared the wolf greatly. Raeger had still not been able to control the curse; he could transform at any moment if he wasn’t careful. Hargoth grew suspicious and followed him into the woods. He sat in the shadows, under the branches of a tall tree, observing Raeger and Lycraon. Suddenly Lycraon stopped

“Raeger. It appears we have someone in our presence,”

Hargoth stopped breathing

“Who?”

“Someone from the village. He has seen us and is not to be trusted,”

‘Shall I turn?”

Lycraon nodded. Raeger’s body twisted and contorted. The pain was no longer overwhelming him. Hargoth witnessed the transformation, but was silenced and could not move. The wolf picked up his scent in the wind. Hargoth regained control of his body and broke into a wild sprint, the wolf following in pursuit. Hargoth ran through the forest sprinting over rubble and fallen trees. He ran until he heard nothing. He looked over his shoulder and saw nothing but trees behind him. Raeger had leapt into the trees, the hard oak branches supporting his weight. He moved stealthily through the treetops, and gently dropped behind Hargoth. The wolf knew this was to be easy from the start.  Hargoth heard the heavy panting of the wolf behind him. As he turned around the wolf swatted him with one of its massive paws. He flew through the air as if he weighed no more than a piece of cloth. He struck a tree and screamed in agony. He could not move his legs. He reached behind his back and felt the handle of his knife, knowing that no matter how hard he fought this would be the end. He realized that the knife he was carrying had come loose and pierced his spine, creating a pool of blood under him. He could do nothing other than stare at the beast that used to be his best friend.

“I beg of you, Raeger, it’s me, Hargoth,” he pleaded.

The wolf took its time lumbering up to him. As it moved it let out a roar of triumph. He had succeeded in outsmarting and catching its very first prey. Hargoth stared on in fear. Soon the wolf reached him. It bared its fangs and growled.

“Don’t, Raeger, It’s me�"“

The fangs of the wolf’s closed around his throat and cut off his plea. Raeger transformed back into a human and he looked upon the fallen body of his prey. It was his friend, Hargoth, lying on the forest floor and when Raeger realized what he had done, a wave of grief washed over him. He fell to his knees sobbing and started cursing the very air around him.

“It seems you are ready,” said Lycraon, who had appeared behind him.

“What are you talking about?” Raeger said between sobs.

“To aid me in destroying the village. You will help me murder the people that banished me,”

“I will never harm those who cared for me ,”he spat,

“The people who supposedly care for you will kill you if they realize what you are! They are not your friends!”

“They took me in when I had no one left,”

“Traitorous fool! it is time I silenced you once and for all.”

The two brothers were overcome by rage. One turning for the betrayal of his brother, and the other to defend the people who care for him. Their bodies started to twist and turn, their bones cracked and broke. Their muscles burned and tore, remolding into wolves. When their transformations completed they began to circle around each other. Raeger lunged at his brother, clipping his left rib cage. Lycraon sank his fangs into Raeger’s leg. Raeger retaliated by repeatedly bashing his brother’s head until he loosened his grip. Now free from each other, they began to circle each other again. This time it was Lycraon who attacked. Raeger dodged his brother, causing Lycraon to go flying into the tree behind Raeger. His claws were impaled into the tree. Enraged, he tore out his hand from the tree. 2 of his claws still remained embedded in the trunk.  There was a flash of claws and fangs, blood flying from both brothers. Finally Raeger pinned his brother to the ground. Lycraon began howling and kicking, trying to break free from Raeger’s grip, but to no avail.  Accepting his defeat Lycraon roared at Raeger in a language only he could understand.

“Kill me now! Murder the only family you have left, brother!”

Raeger’s anger took over his body. His fangs sunk deep into his brother’s neck. There was a slight howl, then complete silence.  Raeger reverted back to his human form, and Lycraon did too, still barely alive. Raeger ran clutched his brother’s dying body.

 “We could have lived as kings,” Lycraon rasped

“I could not let you kill them. They were my family,”Raeger said behind tears.

“Farewell, brother may the wolf not control you,” Lycraon said. With that he drew his last breath. The light faded from his eyes.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry” he whispered to the ears that could no longer hear.

Raeger stood there, holding his brother’s dead body. Grief had taken hold of Raeger’s soul.  So many of his loved ones had been taken by rage. His Father killed at war, his mother murdered during an invasion and finally his brother and his best friend died at his own hands. Death was his curse now. He could not save anyone. The elder had been wrong. Raeger was no savior, he was the destroyer, a slave to the wolf. He took both bodies to the same cave he first slept in. and dug 2 graves. After laying the corpses down, he looked at his own body. 6 months ago his body was clean, unscarred and soft. Now it had hardened, as had his heart. He was no longer a man; neither was he a corpse like in his dreams. Raeger was a wolf.

Author's Note

ok so this is the same story as last time. this is however the edited version, thanks to my friend (who shall not be named. so there is some new stuff in the story.if you would please point out the points in the story that are better and the weaker points :) danke

Reviews

[SheActsLikeSummer]

This is really great. You've made tons of edits that work in favour of the piece and have done a brilliant job of fixing it up which is a lot harder than it seems so kudos.
I have created this in a word document and have written down my comments there. I think it will be an easier way to tell you what I think than a list here. I'll send it to you on Facebook. :)
Anyway, very well done. It's fantastic. I hope to read more of any other work you have created. Excellent work.