Eli O'Connor's Voyage Through Avalon Part1

It's not always good to get what you want.

“It’s not fair!” We’ve all said it once or twice or trice before. And sometimes when it’s said, we really don’t know what we’re talking about. When we get what we asked for there are times we wish we didn’t. If not, then congratulations my friend: You don’t exist!  And this story isn’t for you. But for all of us who do, maybe you’ve heard this tale before. It’s starts with a boy called Eli. It could well be that you know him. He lives somewhere it the south of Dublin, knows a talking bear and a queen who’s two feet tall. No? Never heard of him?

Well that’s good. You wouldn’t want to. Also his tale is quite bizarre. He doesn’t really like to talk about it. He finds it too weird. As I’m sure you do too.

    

Don’t worry though. Soon it’ll all make sense… hopefully.

I don’t like repeating myself too much and I don’t plan on typing everything out twice. So read carefully. Now, where should I start this tale? Maybe at the end and then work my way back? No, that wouldn’t work. The middle would just confuse you. I suppose for your sakes I’ll have to start at the beginning then.
So where would that be? Hmm… ah yes here we go…

 

“It’s not fair!” he yelled. Eli was awfully spoiled. No one could tell him anything. Except for what he wanted to hear. There was always some horrified look on his face when anyone would dare to say ‘no’ to any of his requests. This time he really exploded. At eleven, he was still known to throw tantrums like a small child.  And on a day like today where the house is practically upside down, with everyone zooming around, doing their last minute work before leaving for a flight, no one wanted Elis tantrums.

 

“It is fair! After what you did Eli. This time it was too far,” replied a woman. She’s his mother. And just like the rest of the family, they couldn’t risk Eli going on holiday with them and spoiling their vacation. He’d already gotten himself into big trouble. So as the rest of everyone would be basking in the warm Australian sun, Eli would find himself in England. Where he would stay with his Uncle Harris. His uncle didn’t do much but stay in his house, writing up maths equations and reading books. The idea was if Eli couldn’t do much then maybe, he wouldn’t do anything.

 

“You can’t just leave me! Everyone else is gone off on holidays and I’m stuck doing nothing for two weeks!”

 

“A month actually,” she replied, “and it’ll keep you out of trouble.”

 

“I’ll be bored! All Uncle Harris ever talks about is books and maths, nothing ever important.”

 

“He’s a Maths and English teacher, Eli.”

 

“Yes! The two most annoying subject. One teaches me a language I ALREADY know and the other a whole lot of things I’ll never NEED to know.”

 

“Honestly, I’ve never heard so much nonsense from the one gob before!” declared his mother, rolling her eyes to the high heavens.

 

“Things don’t need to make sense! No sense is better!” snapped Eli childishly. He really just wanted to have the last word. He continued to pester everyone as they continued with their final arrangements before leaving the house. No one gave much attention to his shouting and rambling. Being the youngest of five brothers and three sisters, he was used to getting what he wanted. But not this time. The fact that they were all packing their warm summer clothes while his suitcase consisted mostly of coats and welly boots, really got on his nerves.

There was nothing more that he disliked than being left out.  At the same time it’s quite easy to understand why people would avoid him. Being arrogant and selfish can have the effect of repelling people quicker than a plate of Uncle Harris’ Special Haggis. Only to be eaten while having a serious fever, the fowl odor alone could stink up a house for days! And it tasted even worse. It worked though. But that’s a different story.  The point is that being like Uncle Harris’ Special Haggis (having a bad reputation and being even worse in person) left Eli practically friendless. This only worked to make him even more selfish, since he had no one he’d want to share anything with. So as he sat there watching them all packing and laughing, he was thinking on the lines of “ If I can’t enjoy this, no one should.”

 

“Eli it’s time to leave,” said his mother, “Eli?”

 

“I’m not going,” said a voice from the top of the stairs. Eli sat with the sourest face he could fashion. He had made it his duty to have everyone as miserable as he was for as long as he had the chance.

 

“Eli Franklin O’Connor! You get down here now! We’ve a flight to make and we’re not missing it because of your attitude problems.” Still he sat there, not even phased, just looking ever more miserable.

 

“Boys!” yelled his mother. Eli didn’t have to be told what this meant.

 It happened quite often. Occasionally He would sulk and refuse to leave the house with everyone else. Then his brothers would be called to fetch him.

As soon as his mother summoned the boys, he didn’t even hesitate before making a run for it. It was pointless really; all he could do was run into one of the rooms.

It’s not like he could fly out the window or anything. Still, even though it would be over in a matter of seconds he’d run and hide anyway. Just to be a bother.

 

Now as you could probably imagine, after what happened earlier, the ride to the airport would not be a pleasant one. If it wasn’t an annoying travel song, it was randomly blaring loud music on his phone. If it wasn’t blaring loud music it was randomly shouting ‘Deer!’ even though they were in the city center. Anything just to make everyone pay for not wanting to take him with them.

 

“Honestly Eli! You’re doing me head in!” shouted Ciara (the second youngest).

 

“MY head not ME head!” sneered Eli.

 

“Oh would ya leave us alone!”

 

“Leave ME alone you mean.”

 

“Just be quiet!”

 

“Oh I’m sorry. Unfair isn’t it?” replied Eli sarcastically. Being the only one born in England in an all-Irish family, he loved to put a thicker accent than usual, just too separate him from them. Not only that but he loved to act as if he wrote the book on grammar, by constantly correcting their pronunciation.

 

“It’s exactly this sort of behavior that landed you in trouble Eli!” exclaimed his father, “Now I suggest you put a lid on that gob of yours or we’ll send you somewhere even more boring than your Uncle’s. Got it?”

 

Eli didn’t respond. He simply folded his arms and became all pouty like a child. Sometimes his parents couldn’t believe how he behaved. They would never have had much of a reason to attend a parent-teacher meeting since his grades were exceptionally high. Were it not for the fact that he was a little terror in the classroom, all the teachers would’ve loved him.

 

“Your son’s biggest problem is himself,” a teacher once remarked. The poor woman was simply on her teacher-training program at his school. She never expected to run into such a boy as him. At least we can safely say that she’s now well prepared to work at any school, no matter how bad the pupils are. That is to say if she hasn’t already quit.

 

“So am I just going to take a plane to England all on my own then?”

 

“No. Uncle Harris is waiting at the airport to relieve us of- take you to his house,” said his mother.

 

“Well,” said Eli offended, “I’m sorry to see that I’m such a burden to everyone.”

 

“No, you’re not sorry. And that’s the problem,” she added. For the rest of the journey to the airport, he remained silent. Even if one of his siblings would pass a sly remark about him, Eli would say nothing. This was strange behavior. He concluded to himself that if they don’t want him, then he doesn’t want them. In fact he doesn’t need them. He’ll just go to England and run away. Sixty million people? They’d never find him.

Sitting there in the car fuming with anger, he wished the weather were a lot less cheerful. At this moment, he had no desire for the sun to be out and birds to chirp on this beautiful summers day. No. He wanted thunder and lightning and hailstones.

Just anything more dramatic, to show exactly how he felt. These were all normal thoughts for Eli. In fact this had always been a problem with him: wanting everything done his way. Nothing else really mattered.

 

One can only imagine the sort of trouble that Eli would get himself into at the airport. He was being most uncooperative with everyone. Twice was airport security summoned due to his actions. It was only after a good hour and the threat of police intervention that Eli eventually calmed himself. He had been running around knocking peoples suitcases and throwing tiny round sweets on the ground. It was only after knocking down a bookstand that his brothers managed to attain him.

 

“What do you think you’re at!” yelled Stephen (the oldest son). As soon as he caught up with Eli, yanking him by the arm. There was clearly a fury in Stephen’s eyes that said, “It’s a good thing that we’re on public or else you’d be worse off.” The books were scattered all over the floor. They could’ve been easily picked up but flowers underneath the stand, as well as the expensive perfumes were ruined. Maybe three or four bottles survived. But with fifty already destroyed, it didn’t matter. The floor was decorated with pages and flowers, all scented and useless. And there in the midst of it all was trouble. Eli standing there with all eyes on the scene, clearly not sorry for any of the trouble he caused.

 

“If you hadn’t of chased after me then none of this would’ve happened!” he declared.

 

“Oh don’t you start with me!” replied Stephen, “all this is your fault!”

 

“How is it?!”

 

“I’m not even going to bother with you anymore! You’re a waste of our time. I can’t wait to get away you no that? EVERYONE can’t wait to get away. Poor Uncle Harris having to mind you for the three weeks. Should’ve just sent you off to boarding school while we had the chance instead of waiting till September!”

Stephen’s rant continued a while. This time it was enough. They all expected that after the last stunt that Eli pulled earlier in the year, he would’ve learnt by now. What he did was so serious, that since February he hasn’t been granted any extra privileges such as going to the cinema, playing outside, watching any television or even having ice cream. It was decided that starting from September, he would be flown off to a strict military school in the states. Where he would remain for the duration of his school life. Yet to Eli, it all still wasn’t fair.

 

“Oh you really did it this time!” shouted his mother. The shop assistant was clearly still in shock at what had just occurred so suddenly.

 

“Nay me store! It’s in bits!” he yelled, with his hands over his head.

“We’re very sorry,” replied Eli’ mother, “honestly we are very very sorry.”

 

“But me store its in bits! I’ll have to sponge up good few hundred quid to fix this!”

 

“Here I’ll write a check, “she proceeded to root anxiously through her handbag. She was generally a shy woman, so all of this attention didn’t help one bit. Twice she almost dropped her handbag due to being so nervous. And when it came to actually writing the check, her hands became so weak it took her a good thirty seconds to sign it properly.

 

It was amazing how understanding the security manager had been. Everyone excepted that Eli would have to be sent home. Meaning that the whole vacation would have to be cancelled (it wouldn’t of been a very good idea to leave him in a house by himself, not since last time).

 

“What do you have to say for yourself Eli?” asked his father angrily. All eyes were on him. It was one of those situations were you knew both what you felt like saying yet at the same time it would land you in more trouble, or what you should say and just admit that you were wrong. But Eli was sly. He figured out a way both to say what he would like to and what he should.

 

“Well,” he started his sentence, “While you were all busy packing, I took your passports and left them on the kitchen counter.”