Unplugged

Music plays in my ears but I don’t really hear it. There’s another person in the room. She’s close to me, not in the physical sense, but a family member. This lonely room so crowded with relics from a past I’ve never lived. Everything is so full of life around me, static through the radio, the television screen flickering about with a DVD intro. So much is happening all around me. And Nothing. Nothing is happening inside of me. I try to connect to the world around me, but there’s nothing here, nothing relevant. Nothing for m to make that connection with. There is some fundamental piece of me, something essential for my making a place in this room, this world, this life, that simply isn’t there. It’s like I don’t belong here, Like one red lego, pieced into a castle with all blue blocks. I seem so out of place.I belong somewhere else. In another life, in another world,

Where cars rush by me, their drivers scanning their surroundings to remain aware. Busses bustle throughout the streets, pouring residents to their destinations like blood through an artery. Buildings tower above my home, soaring into the sky. Beacons of human achievement, but also the representation of the greed and power I try so desperately to avoid in my transition into this life. My refrigerator is well stocked with fresh food. The television is off, and we sit together laughing, playing a board game. We discuss our day. She had a patient saying all manner of nonsense when he came too from his surgery. I talk about my day, I made a huge sale today, My rare find came to fruition today! We sip red wine like old friends, there was never any strife. That life was just a dream.