Learning to laugh

When did we learn that we weren't complete without someone else?

Learning to laugh

I had been told for years that a woman is nothing without a man. And as an independent adult woman, I am saddened by this.

I remember on my thirtieth birthday I had been drinking heavily, second time in my life doing this, and went far beyond what I could handle. The night ended with me in a fit of tears wetting the shirts of all my friends because, “I’m not married and I don’t have any children.”

I often find it difficult to talk with my mother each week because the first thing that comes out of her mouth is, “How’s so and so? Are we expecting a wedding any time soon? I can’t wait for you to have babies!” It is even more annoying when I tell people I may be infertile and hear them sigh, with a depressed look upon their faces, telling me, “Don’t give up faith. There’s still a chance.” When did a woman become defined by her ability to conceive? When was she just a mother? We’re more than that.

I don’t want to say how many men I’ve dated, how many engagements I’ve run away from, or how many times I’ve cried because, “I can’t find ‘the one’." These aren’t the important things in life that classify me as the woman I am today. However, I am coming to realize, I have believed this was all that defined me. And for a moment there, I almost settled with someone because I was ready to begin my life. But life had begun years ago!

I’m not burning my bra in effigy. I’m not denouncing men. I’m not a feminist in the radical terms stereotypes assign. I am merely saying that I am learning how to laugh without a man present in my life. I am learning to be comfortable with just me.

Reviews

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Whoa 195 views and no one write single word. So I be dare and I spent my words here. First language what you use. Is very simple and easy to understandt what you want say. Short notice about your life. Honesty and no shame and that s great. Words are not hide your personality. Second I have same story like you . I never find somebody who will be able live with me. And maybe that s right too. Important is dont give up on your self and treat your self right. Glade you wrote this.