Home.

My thoughts on home after a few months of being away from it.

I remember when the sun used to wait up for us. I remember when you fell. I remember carrying you to the car that drove you to the hospital.  I remember it all and that’s the worst part. I remember when smiles were always natural.  I remember when things were too hot and too cold and we were too drunk to say the things we wanted to but it didn’t matter because we knew, we could tell what the other was thinking and it worked, words weren’t as necessary as they are now and we could just sit, sit and be happy and sit and be sad and sit and just be teenagers, sit and wonder and be curious and sit and sit and sit and sit and run and run as fast as we could, sometimes scared and sometimes not and I remember keeping our balance, I remember railroad tracks and I remember boys and girls and I remember learning from everyone I was around and asking questions and never getting tired of the answers and I remember how the sun looked, I remember the shades of pink and purple that made life better, and I remember it all, I really do, I remember everything even if my mind doesn’t want me to I remember the tough times and I remember crying I remember watching the terrible decisions and just wanting to know why, why, why did it have to happen like that but at this point it doesn’t matter, none of it does, only the good remains and that’s all that matters, that’s all that ever should have mattered, all I wanted was the end and now all I want is the beginning, I remember rolling down the hill in summer, the weekend before I left. The weekend before it changed.

 

When I return, it won’t be to the same place.

 

That town is gone and that sun is gone and those times are gone and so are we.

 

And of course, it’s not that summer anymore.

 

I remember it all, every little thing and I won’t forget.

I remember when everything was fine.

Do you remember?