THE LOVE OF HER LIFE

Touching mother and child story

THE LOVE OF HER LIFE

 

Juliana crouched and stooped over the lively green rows of radishes, carrots, and peppers, hands sweating inside the heavy thick gloves as she dug and ripped the pernicious weeds out of the dry brown earth. After an hour she was drenched in sweat and trembling with exhaustion. The sun, usually a welcome friend, had flayed at her mercilessly and she staggered to the back steps of the house and collapsed.

 

Samuel rescued her. A six-year-old angel dressed in blue jean shorts and a short sleeve shirt appeared on the porch behind her, diligently balancing a tall glass of iced tea. As she turned round he said quietly, "Here, Mommy," offering the drink.

 

Taking the big glass from his little hands, she reached up and brushed the blonde bangs away from his forehead. She smiled. "Thanks." A moment later she was gulping and slurping and gasping for breath.

 

Samuel sat beside her on the steps. His brown eyes watched her face. "John called." He gave an audible sigh. "I'm s'posed to tell you."

 

She patted his shoulder reassuringly. "I'm not going out tonight."

 

The boy brightened.

 

"We're having pizza and watching videos, just like we said."

 

"Really?"

 

Juliana pinched his neck playfully. "Really."

 

A very serious look slipped onto Samuel's face. "Good. ’Cause I miss you sometimes when you go out."

 

"I know, honey."

 

"Can we-" Samuel dipped his head and blinked. "Can we watch the turtles?"

 

She took another sip and looked out over the garden. Her voice was playful, "Again?"

 

Samuel nearly whispered, "Please."

 

His face was screwed up with hopefulness and she had to control the impulse to laugh. "Maybe. But you've watched that movie- how many times already?"

 

"Fourteen," the boy announced proudly.

 

"You're going to wear that CD out."

 

"Can you do that?"

 

"Maybe." Her hand couldn't resist tickling his belly, just a little.

 

"Aw, Mommy." Samuel's peered with curiousness. "You're teasing me."

 

"I don't know."

 

"You are."

 

He was so darned cute that she just couldn't help but smile. Resisting the urge to give him a hug, she said, "I need a shower. Let's go in."

 

Samuel stood, grasping her hand. A tiny groan escaped him as he tugged and helped her up. "Thank you kind sir," she told him.

 

"You sure you don't mind, Mommy?" Samuel led the way, opening the door. "Watching the turtles?"

 

"No, you know I like Shredder."

 

Samuel's eyes popped open. "Mommy! Shredder's mean. He's the bad guy."

 

She stood in the kitchen with a finger at her chin. "Hmm? Maybe it's Raphael that I like."

 

He gave her a little shove. "I like Raphael. You like Michelangelo, remember?"

 

"Ohhh. That's right."

 

Samuel impulsively gave her a hug. "Thanks for staying home tonight." Then he grew embarrassed and left her there, wandering away into the living room. He latched onto the remote and turned on the TV.

 

Starting down the hall, she said, "I'm going get cleaned up."

 

"Okay, Mommy."

 

A few minutes later Juliana was relaxing under the warm cleansing spray in the shower. It felt so good to sluice the grime and sweat from her body. Her mind wandered as she closed her eyes and reveled in the wonderful tingling sensations that swept over her body. A silly smile slipped onto her face as she thought about Samuel sitting out there on the couch. Undoubtedly his hands were curled together on his lap as he was leaned forward just a smidgen. She sighed. That little guy was so cute and Juliana knew that loving him was by far the best experience she'd ever had.

 

When she was done and stepped out onto the rug she saw the opaque image in the steam that covered the mirror. It was as if a shadow version of herself stood there looking back at Juliana. She remained motionless and her mind leapt ahead into the future. What would she think of herself years from now? Would she be proud of the way she'd raised Samuel? He was the world to her and the man that he grew into would be her legacy.

 

Breaking up with Andy, her ex-husband, had been the hardest decision that Juliana had ever made. She still wondered if she'd done the right thing. Samuel was happy now, but how would he feel in the years to come? She went to the sink and wiped the white moisture from the mirror. What would the future reveal?

 

What she saw in the glass was less than uplifting. She was starting to droop here and there and there were sometimes horrid lines under her eyes in the morning. She could see the faint outlines even now.   And as impossible as it seemed, her dark hair had sprouted a few gray ones already. Sometimes the natural changes her body was going through were depressing.

 

The mirror was getting fogged again and she ran a finger on it, drawing a smile over her face. There. Now she was happy. It was so silly that she really did smile. And then she thought about that bright, happy little guy in her life and a shudder of satisfaction ran through her. Samuel. He made her happy.

 

A familiar nagging thought seeped into her brain and she remembered that John had called. John, the perfect guy that was everything a woman could ask for. A nice guy with a great personality, but yet for Juliana there was something missing. John was polite to Samuel, but it was impossible ignore his ambivalence toward children. And as time went on, she realized more and more that maybe that was a deal breaker. She toweled herself off, thinking about how alone she'd felt when she'd met John. Could she stand to be that lonely again?

 

After Juliana was dressed she went through the hall and stopped just before she entered the living room. There was her boy, scrunched into one corner of the couch like the cutest thing she could ever imagine. How could John not like kids? How could he not love a child as wonderful as Samuel?

 

Suddenly Samuel looked up. "Mommy?" He grinned. "Are you spying on me, Mommy?"

 

And just like that, Juliana knew that she would have to break it off with John. She needed a man that wanted to share the most important thing in her life. Samuel. Anything less just wasn't right. Not for her. She sighed. "That's right. I'm spying." Samuel giggled as she joined him on the couch.

 

"Well . . . " Samuel leaned against her. "I'm not doing anything bad."

 

She gave him a hug. "This time."

 

He protested in a happy voice, "I'm a good boy. You always say that."

 

"You are a good boy."

 

Hugging her back, he said softly, "And you're the best Mommy in the whole world."

 

Though she knew his statement couldn't possibly be true, Juliana was glad to hear him say it. All she could be was the best mother she knew how to be, for her son and herself. And if the right guy came along someday that would be great. But he'd have to be right for the both of them. She gave Samuel's forehead a big kiss and squeezed him so tight that he squirmed away and let loose with a little groan. He crossed his arms as if offended, staring at the TV. And her heart melted like soft butter on a warm summer's day.

Reviews

[Alan Zizou]

It's beautifully written. It's sensitive and warm. Anyone can feel the war that's going on Juliana's head. In a few words, it's a nice story, something that must happen to lots of girls everywhere. Even though, I feel that it's a part of something bigger - I can imagine that the author can expand it in a way to show us what happens next. I sure would like to know.

[Friend of a Friend]

The description is really good, I feel like I'm right there in the room with the characters! The only thing I would suggest changing is taking out one of the "cutes." I feel like maybe there could be some other way to describe the little boy (not in every case, just maybe once). Other than that though, I loved it!