Who killed the Spirit of our Earth?

The Spirit of our Earth is weeping, sleeping,

comatose, non mentos compos.

 

A sinuous, sensuous, tenuous grasp

is all that remains;

fabricated mankind, vapourific spirituality,

flabbergasted at the amusing notion that

some things exist that can be neither bought nor sold.

 

Delicate strength opposes 

powerful weakness. 

 

Corruption, a staple of capitalist consumption,

like dying varec in various oceans;

its stink is long lingering.

We are as voyeurs, watching the peepshow

of our world meeting its demise. 

 

Reviews

[Leslie Philibert]

I think Jeremy writes really well, I´ve read a number of his poems are they are all excellent, written with care and thought, full of literary value. This is a cracker too, Jeremy is not afraid to take a position and take on a real big subject, and it´s not only excellently written, but has the right moral position, and transports it with lyrical power. Great.

[joshua deathdealer]

wow!! This is flawless.

[koty bell]

a very sad feel but great writh none the less :))

[Kiari Sabon]

every cycle ends at one point so new can begin

[Ruth]

Too true love...whilst we sleep, dumbed down by control...what is really happening? Makes you realise huh? Poignant and reaching love, great piece! xoxo

[An owl on the moon]

You drive the words with such a powerful rhythm and rhyme that awakens us to this horrid plight of earth and sky... Yes, we must not merely watch, but must listen and stand alert in this hour.

[Warren L.G De Mills]

INdeed our world is dying. It is because of man's terrible abuse of it. Sad...Good piece

[khalid]

i really worry about the world of what it is facing.

[Brenden Moran]

Love the topic and word choice overall. Your first two words in the second line end in "ing" which really keep the flow going, but then you end it with "ose" which hits a bump in the flow of the readers mind. I see how it rhymes with the next line but it is done so awkwardly. Your fourth line is perfect. Sixth line could use something to make it flow. Line 12 could also use some work on its rhythm (basically take out the first comma: "Corruption is a...")Also, on your third to last line, the word "stink" really stuck out and I think you should try to find a different synonym. The three shortest lines really halt the moment of your words. By splitting what you have here into lines you force the reader to pause at the end of each one and then wonder why he put that certain break there, however, I also look at what that does to your rhythm and at those three points it stops awkwardly. Overall this is a great write, thanks for sharing.

[Kenneth The Poet]

So true, Jeremy. An excellent lament, worthy of Bible status I think.

[KATHY SUE SILLS]

Love it when you share a poem with me! Your vocabulary is always strong and powerful, and this poem has so much of reality written in it! Crafted perfectly!