Tortured a Poem By: J.L. Jacobs ©2015

Living with a chronic and painful illness isn't easy. I wrote this poem when I was feeling especially down one day.

Like a flower in bloom,

that loses it's petals one by one.

So goes the story of my life,

and I swear- I'm about done.

I have regrets from my past,

I'm sure others do as well.

But the pile of my regrets,

in my mind forever they'll dwell.

I have no comfort for my body,

there is nothing to ease my mind.

And if there's a soul left,

It's not one I want to find.

I've lost all of my passions,

and any lust I had is gone.

I have friends who have left me,

my life is literally a country song.

No one is in love with me,

in return I feel the same.

I'm just a shell of a person,

who's playing life�" and tired of the game.

I've been sick for so many years,

battling this freaking disease.

It's done everything to ruin me,

and there is literally no relief.

I'm just sitting here pondering,

what my life has become.

If I was ever offered a "do-over"

I don't even think I'd want one.

I've made wishes to the stars,

and I've made wishes in the wells.

I've even prayed fervently,

yet I'm still living in this hell.

Life doesn't seem to favor me,

I have said this many times.

What have I done to deserve this life?

for I've never committed any crimes.

Can't life cut me some slack,

I desperately need a break!

I am such a tortured soul,

yet I am only here for my children's sake.

This disease has ruined,

every good and worthy part of me.

It completely taken over my body,

and there is nowhere I can flee.

All's I want is some relief from this pain,

that afflicts my mind and body.

But even doctors cannot help,

and I just sit here often sobbing.

I am so tortured can't you tell?

It's time for me to find some peace,

because I am so damned overwhelmed.

So torture me this, and torture me that,

I am so over it all right now!

I deserve some peace at last,

and this is my solemn vow!

Reviews

[mattavelli]

Hi, I enjoyed reading your poem. What is the vow, mentioned in the last line?

[JL Jacobs]

Her vow is to finally, somehow, someway... find some much deserved peace

[mattavelli]

Got it :)
I'm slow to catch on sometimes.

[Relic]

If there was ever a poem that came from deep inside, this is it. To spill such a sad tale makes even the reader wonder how you do it. I wish you only the best.