The Gloaming

Just playing with the color of words.

She stands on the cliff's edge, looking down on the valley below.
It's hard to believe that she is still earthbound, as most of her view consists of sky. It's a rich yellow honey color blending into a blue purple black as the sun slips closer to the land. She feels that she could reach out and touch it, cup both hands around the delicious light and keep a handful of the sunset for herself. The sun's last amber rays touch the tree tops below, infusing their leaves with a glowing life.
This is the best time of day, when the sun's beams look their last upon the world. On its way out, the sun dazzles us with its final display, as though it is reluctant to see us turn toward the moon for the night. Bathing the landscape in gentle jewel colors, the sun hopes to guarantee that we will lament its departure and eagerly anticipate greeting it on the morning.
The woman stands above the glowing valley, drinks in the fading light and sways to the birdsong bidding the day a fond farewell. She allows her cares and worries to slide away as easily as easily as she slips off her shoes. Barefoot, swaying, the grass luxurious and warm beneath her. The breeze coming up from the valley tastes of spring and sunset and the encroaching night. Crickets join in the chorus as a velvet purple overtakes the sky, pushing down the last of the fiery pinks and swirling golden rays.
She spreads her arms wide, greeting the first distant stars still invisible to the unaided eye. Deeply she breathes in the very last bit of the day, savoring its sorrows and its triumphs. She smiles at the night sky like an old friend.
As the last sliver of light retreats to the horizon, she steps from the cliff, arms still open, and chases the sunset.

Author's Note

Not really a story, more of an anecdote.
I think she flies....
Please feel free to share your thoughts and opinions!

Reviews

[SweetNutmeg]

This is a short piece but it packs a real punch.

"The breeze coming up from the valley tastes of spring and sunset and the encroaching night."

I can smell and taste this! I can feel it on my tongue, sense it on my skin, feel it with my soul.

Thank you for sharing this with us.

[JLGottschalk]

Thank you for reading, I'm glad you enjoyed it.

[Pryde Foltz]

She spreads her arms wide, greeting the first distant stars still invisible to the unaided eye. Deeply she breathes in the very last bit of the day, savoring its sorrows and its triumphs.

Spectacular piece of prose poetry.

[JLGottschalk]

Thank you, Pryde. I appreciate that.

[Peninsula Pariah]

Was like peeking my head into the world next to my own. Maybe they overlap. May this turn into something lengthy. Im sure it wants to be.

[JLGottschalk]

Not sure about this one...it just kind of happened one night with too much downtime on my hands at work. The words kept me company. I'm glad you liked it, thank you for reading!

[A. H. Pinley]

This sounds like the scape through the eyes of a child. Stories like this are good exercises for the bigger stories. I have a few short stories that do just that, exercise. Keep writing...

[JLGottschalk]

Thank you, I appreciate the encouragement.

[A. Amos]

Good story telling and would be interested to read more...

[JLGottschalk]

Thank you, I appreciate that.

[RobertLA]

I like the writing style, but the tense of it bothers me juuust a tad. Like how you switch from past-tense like "She stands" to present-tense, like " the sun dazzles us ". This could just be your writing style though, which is no problem.

EDIT: I am an idiot, forget the tense :P

Planning on starting a series of chapters or full story? I'd be really interested.

[JLGottschalk]

I'm fairly certain that "stands" is present tense, as opposed to "stood". I think...I'll have to double check though, I might be misinformed. And I do have a tendency to mix up tenses, so thank you!
This was just something I was tooling around with at work on my down time. I don't think it will go anywhere, but I never really know. It's not the big project for now, at any rate. That one's not quite ready for exposure...
Thank you so much for the read and the review, I truly appreciate both!

[RobertLA]

Sorry man, you are correct! I mustn't have been very with it that night, I apologise. Just disregard all I said then haha!

[RobertLA]

And just to add to that, I would still like to see more of your writing. If you've got anything you're working on or particularly happy with, just let me know!

[JLGottschalk]

Thanks, I appreciate your vote of confidence! I'm currently putting the finishing touches on a short story, it should be up today or tomorrow.