My Perfect Life

A story about a woman and her 'perfect' life

                My whole life is just perfect. My dream job was gift wrapped and delivered by a golden chariot driven by a handsome and dashing man who fell passionately in love with me at first sight, and married me in a grand affair in a gargantuan church in front of everyone I ever met. We were the most gorgeous couple anyone had ever seen. The wedding gifts included diamonds, gold, silver and cold hard cash. We honeymooned across Europe, seeing all of the major historic places, including the Tower of London, Buckingham Palace, the Eiffel Tower, the Arc de Triomphe, the Louve, the Tower of Pisa, and the castles of Germany. We even took a tour of Scandinavia. Even the weather was perfect! We flew first class home to our massive mansion and enjoyed a huge party and all of our favorite foods and drinks prepared to perfection. As I lay my head down on a comfy pillow in the most luxurious bed I’ve ever had the pleasure of sleeping in, my devoted lover came in and bashed me on the head with a heavy ornate candlestick!

                “I can’t believe I put up with you for so long,” he sneered. “Pleasant dreams, my sweet.”

                He grabbed all of the jewels and precious metals before he left town. The massive mansion was owned by a couple that returned early the next morning from a golfing trip. The dream job offer was fake, and the golden chariot he paid to ride in. I felt stupid for not recognizing the horse drawn carriages that pick people up in the park. I guess I was swept up in the moment. As I lie there bleeding, the couple called the cops. Once they arrived and found what was left of the cold hard cash, they determined that the money was stolen from the Second National Bank two weeks ago. I didn’t belong in the house, and the name of my ‘husband’ did not check out. How humiliating! He was nowhere to be found.

                My family theorized that this ‘man’ must enjoy the finer things in life. He had to get away in a hurry. He must have seen me and decided that escaping on a honeymoon would be more fun than just running off to Europe alone. We did have two momentous parties and a once in a lifetime trip across Europe. Why not? We had a blast. How he knew that my dream was to work as an executive for the Disney corporation I may never know. Maybe it was just a coincidence. At some point, he decided that I was too much trouble. Maybe I wasn’t. It’s possible that he just wanted to leave me as a scapegoat so he could escape scot-free. The police can’t seem to find him even with all of the photos taken of him over that brief period. The dream wedding isn’t legal anyway, since he used a fake name. It all seemed so romantic at the time, but I guess I need to realize that is reality, not some romance novel. Maybe I’ll have another romance in twenty-five to forty years after I kill my number on this armed robbery beef.

Author's Note

I decided to experiment with the idea of putting the happy ending first, then the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune, to see where it would end up. Please read & enjoy!