This is such a warm and heartbreaking piece, Joyce! I am so happy that child has her gramma to love her when her mother cannot. You do these short poems so well. Can you believe I still haven't tried my hand at tanka? What is wrong with me?! This evokes a lot of emotion. Nicely done. Angi~
Posted 11 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
11 Years Ago
Thank you, Angi, for your insightful review. You understood what I was trying to suggest and I reall.. read moreThank you, Angi, for your insightful review. You understood what I was trying to suggest and I really appreciate that. Dreaming room leaves a lot up to the reader, and it's what you bring to a tanka that influences your reading of it. You obviously have the right sensibility for it, but your poetry is very good just the way it is, so I wouldn't worry about not writing tanka. It's not the most popular form around and I hesitate to post them on WC, but posting anything else seems kind of phony since I write mostly just tanka these days. Once again, thank you for your great review!
11 Years Ago
Oh Joyce, never hesitate to post your work. I know many of us would support you. I love your work... read moreOh Joyce, never hesitate to post your work. I know many of us would support you. I love your work. It is an amazing thing to bring a complete and satisfying thought to light in just a few lines. I have a lot of short stuff mixed throughout my pages. These days, my muse cannot get it down in a few words. It will come back to me. You are so welcome, btw.
I knew a lot of guys in the Corps that were raised by their Grandmothers. It is common among the rank and file of the armed forces. So many of us joined because the civilian world had failed us. Broken homes in crappy little towns with high unemployment. That's where a lot of us came from.
Posted 11 Years Ago
11 Years Ago
What a shame, BR. But you and Coyote both turned out to be fine men and great poets, so your caregi.. read moreWhat a shame, BR. But you and Coyote both turned out to be fine men and great poets, so your caregivers cared even if your parents did not. Thanks for the great review. It means a lot to me.
A beautiful poem and photo. Sometime the love of a grandparent is good enough. I was raised by dear Grandparent and I'm okay. Thank you for the amazing poem.
Coyote
Posted 11 Years Ago
11 Years Ago
Thank you, Coyote. Having read several of your poems, I know your Grandparent did a fine job raisin.. read moreThank you, Coyote. Having read several of your poems, I know your Grandparent did a fine job raising you. You your Grandparent were the lucky ones. It makes me sad that many parents miss the joy of a child, because they can't handle the responsibilities.
You say a lot with a little. I love it. And I won't tell you to add another syllable.
Posted 11 Years Ago
11 Years Ago
Thanks, K. I appreciate your appreciation of less rather than more. Sometimes I do think that a lit.. read moreThanks, K. I appreciate your appreciation of less rather than more. Sometimes I do think that a little more might help with the understanding of my poems but then tanka is supposed to provide plenty of dreaming room for the reader so it's generally quite open-ended.
Thank you, Julie, for your kind words. Your child is blessed to have both a loving mother and grand.. read moreThank you, Julie, for your kind words. Your child is blessed to have both a loving mother and grandmother unlike the child in my poem. It's really a shame that so many parents choose to leave their children with their parent who must raise them in their old age. But the grandparents are the lucky beneficiaries of the love that the parents will never enjoy.
11 Years Ago
It is a shame Joyce. I wouldn't want to trade that love for anything!
11 Years Ago
Neither would I, Julie. Being a mother was the most satisfying and joyful thing I ever did!
Thank you, Anne, for reading and reviewing my poem. Children bless their caregivers with a love fo.. read moreThank you, Anne, for reading and reviewing my poem. Children bless their caregivers with a love for which there is no equal. Too bad so many parents these days leave their children with their parents to raise! It really goes beyond my imagination, and I tried to make this poem a testament to the grandmother's love and a condemnation of the mother's action.
11 Years Ago
Ah, I misunderstood, I thought it was the woman who left behind the echo of her memory in her mother.. read moreAh, I misunderstood, I thought it was the woman who left behind the echo of her memory in her mother's mind. There is too much these days of grandparents raising grandchildren...so often drugs are to blame. At least I haven't had to face that...yet.
11 Years Ago
That's the problem with the tanka form, but also part of its beauty. It leaves so much room for dre.. read moreThat's the problem with the tanka form, but also part of its beauty. It leaves so much room for dreaming that the writer's goals are sometimes completely overlooked because the reader doesn't look at the world with the same viewpoint. I just wanted you to see where I was coming from since I really care about this sad situation.
Wonderfully personal and touching. Children are a blessing.
Posted 11 Years Ago
11 Years Ago
Thanks, Pryde. Yes, they are a blessing to those who love and care for them but not for those who i.. read moreThanks, Pryde. Yes, they are a blessing to those who love and care for them but not for those who irresponsibly abandon them! What a shame that so many parents leave their children with their parents to raise. The shame of that action is irredeemable, in my eyes.
This is very beautiful and at the same time heart moving. Though it seems to be a very innocent and simple gift but if its coming from someone that is so special in your heart. It is priceless and would truly melt your heart out. Nothing else matters at that moment . Thanks for sharing Joyce ...I really appreciate reading this piece.
Posted 11 Years Ago
11 Years Ago
Thanks, Neil, for reading and reviewing my poem. Just wanted to share my vision of the child in my .. read moreThanks, Neil, for reading and reviewing my poem. Just wanted to share my vision of the child in my poem with you. I was trying to suggest, that the grandmother is receiving the special gifts of a child, which the mother, who has perhaps abandonned the child, will never receive. Too many children are left with their grandparents by irresponsible parents these days, and I think that is a bloody shame!
This is such a warm and heartbreaking piece, Joyce! I am so happy that child has her gramma to love her when her mother cannot. You do these short poems so well. Can you believe I still haven't tried my hand at tanka? What is wrong with me?! This evokes a lot of emotion. Nicely done. Angi~
Posted 11 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
11 Years Ago
Thank you, Angi, for your insightful review. You understood what I was trying to suggest and I reall.. read moreThank you, Angi, for your insightful review. You understood what I was trying to suggest and I really appreciate that. Dreaming room leaves a lot up to the reader, and it's what you bring to a tanka that influences your reading of it. You obviously have the right sensibility for it, but your poetry is very good just the way it is, so I wouldn't worry about not writing tanka. It's not the most popular form around and I hesitate to post them on WC, but posting anything else seems kind of phony since I write mostly just tanka these days. Once again, thank you for your great review!
11 Years Ago
Oh Joyce, never hesitate to post your work. I know many of us would support you. I love your work... read moreOh Joyce, never hesitate to post your work. I know many of us would support you. I love your work. It is an amazing thing to bring a complete and satisfying thought to light in just a few lines. I have a lot of short stuff mixed throughout my pages. These days, my muse cannot get it down in a few words. It will come back to me. You are so welcome, btw.