eyes dancing

a poem about a grandmother, a child and her missing mother . . .

Author's Note

Graphic credit: Kris Albright Photography

Publication credit: Eucalypt: The Australian Tanka Journal 2012

Reviews

[Angi]

This is such a warm and heartbreaking piece, Joyce! I am so happy that child has her gramma to love her when her mother cannot. You do these short poems so well. Can you believe I still haven't tried my hand at tanka? What is wrong with me?! This evokes a lot of emotion. Nicely done. Angi~

[Joyce S. Greene]

Thank you, Angi, for your insightful review. You understood what I was trying to suggest and I really appreciate that. Dreaming room leaves a lot up to the reader, and it's what you bring to a tanka that influences your reading of it. You obviously have the right sensibility for it, but your poetry is very good just the way it is, so I wouldn't worry about not writing tanka. It's not the most popular form around and I hesitate to post them on WC, but posting anything else seems kind of phony since I write mostly just tanka these days. Once again, thank you for your great review!

[Angi]

Oh Joyce, never hesitate to post your work. I know many of us would support you. I love your work. It is an amazing thing to bring a complete and satisfying thought to light in just a few lines. I have a lot of short stuff mixed throughout my pages. These days, my muse cannot get it down in a few words. It will come back to me. You are so welcome, btw.

[Benita-Staebell M - Kin..]

very touching heartwarming
piece here.



very lovely read I enjoyed this.


Thank you for sharing.


Blessings. Benita

[Joyce S. Greene]

Thank you for your kind review, Benita. I wish you the best of luck with yo9ur poetry! Joyce

[Benita-Staebell M - KindredPoet]

you're welcome. :) thank you

[Ma'at]

i hate to use cliches, but this piece is the shortest and sweetest poem i have ever seen on this website. it is so open and welcoming, yet powerful and sad at the same time, i love that contradiction in such a small piece. it is incredible.

[luvingu01]

this poem is soo beautiful. it literally inserts a hand into the soul and pulls a tear from the eye.

[Joyce S. Greene]

Thanks once again for reading and reviewing my work so kindly. Your words brought a smile to my face. Write on!

[Madison O'Dwyer]

"Eyes dancing" was a striking beautiful line to open what would become an absolutely heartbreaking and elegant poem. Thanks for sharing :)

[Shaun Payton]

a childs eyes dance with innocence and love. That should always be embraced.

[Joyce S. Greene]

Each child deserves to be loved and when his or her parents can't or won't, then a loving grandparent may step in. Thanks for leaving me your thoughts, Shaun, I very much appreciate hearing them.

[Shaun Payton]

Yes indeed they do. You are welcome Joyce.

[Eddie Phillips]

Sweet poem laced with a tinge of sadness.

[Joyce S. Greene]

Thank you, Eddie, for taking the time to let me know your thoughts about my poem.

[Praveeta]

A truly touching poem and image. Your work incites feelings in the reader. Great work.

[Vidya Bacchus]

At least she has grandmother who obviously loves her alot.You have written this piece straight from your heart .It is lovely when you can say so much with so few words i wish i could.You are truly great writer

[Joyce S. Greene]

Thank you, Vidya. Your words have warmed my heart on a very chilly day.

[Vidya Bacchus]

Awwwww you are ver sweet:)

[Clara]

This a beautifully moving piece, Joyce. I love how you are able to just tap into emotions so easily.

I wasn't abandoned by my mother, but I only really saw her on the weekends when I went home. My grandmother raised me from a very young age and I was exceptionally close to her. She also had a more noble character than my mother. She was always patient, soft-spoken and soft-hearted, selfless, unassuming and incredibly loving woman - in the most unconditional way. My mother told me that I would cry and beg her to let me stay with my grandmother.

We had a special bond - and I've missed her everyday since she's passed on.
Thank you for reminding me of the beautiful memories I shared with her.

[Joyce S. Greene]

Your grandmother sounds like she was a wonderful woman, Lola, and I can understand why you cared for her so deeply. Some mothers just aren't capable of being caregivers, and I'm sorry she was one of them, but very glad you were fortunate to have had such a loving grandmother. Both my parents passed on within the past six years and it has been very hard to deal with that. I began writing poetry in 2009 a couple of years after my mother's passing and just before my father's. I've found writing to be very cathartic in dealing with their losses. God bless you, Lola, and thank you for your very gracious reviews.

[Clara]

I am very sorry to hear about your parents, Joyce. I can't imagine what that would be like. I don't think you ever get over something like that but at the same token, I think it's so inspirational that you are brave enough to write and deal with your losses. Experience definitely opens up a whole way of seeing life and expressing your responses to life's events.

God bless you too, Joyce. You're an amazing woman.

[Joyce S. Greene]

Have a very joyous Thanksgiving, Lola.

[Clara]

Thank you, Joyce.

Unfortunately in Australia, we don't celebrate Thanksgiving. :( I will still be thankful though! Hope you have a wonderful festive time with your family and friends!

[PANTHER]

All emotions sweep across the mind of a grandparent as these lines are read. Thinking I'll put love at the start and finish. Vey powerful write Joyce. Tom

[Joyce S. Greene]

Thank you, Tom. I appreciate your reading my words and leaving such insightful reviews.