Set Me Free

These bars of this cage
Leave me stiffened
And it leaves me enraged

Set my free spirit free
It's not meant to be still
Don't imprison me for your will

I'll rattle this cage
Until you give in & set me free
From this person like me

I dream of escape
And the wonders of forbidden landscape
The mountains, filled with snow
The beaches that lead to the ocean below

Set me free from me
My spirit, free, forever needs be...

Reviews

[Trigorin]

Not bad. A few weak rhymes here and there, and I think you could cut the ellipses at the end - looks very indecisive, and I personally hate that sort of thing to end a poem with. You have a good concept, though, and you've done well expanding it. The second to last stanza is the best. Good work.

[J. F. Charleston]

Thanks for the review. Yeah, I suppose that there are some weak spots, but I didn't really care when I wrote it. Actually to tell the truth, I have no idea why I put the ellipses at the end. I seem to have a bad habit of it.