The Haiku Storm

Five Haiku makes the storm.

A large, billowed, cloud

eats most of the sky above,

and then comes the rain.

Large drops of rain fall

as the sun turns to shadows,

and the rivers rise.

Crack! --- Flashes occur!

Sounds of thunder rumbling.

Crack! The landscape shines.

Flashes in the sky.

Then hail falls, coating the land,

as all of life hides.

With morning comes dawn.

Cloudless, and full of sunshine,

is another day.

JE Falcon

02-22-2022

Reviews

[Mike Keenan]

Nice. I like the first one best.

[JE Falcon]

Did you notice that I changed the capitalizations? After further research, I decided to take the standard, the first letter in each sentence, approach.

[M. J. Smith]

You capture the nature of storms so well. Almost, you make me feel as if I were in it. I can fell the coldness of the rain, the hail pelting me. I can hear thunder, see lightning ripping shadows to shreds. Beautifully done, Sir.

[JE Falcon]

Thanks. --- Storms are best viewed from afar, and from inside a cozy place. Like a mind :)

[Unspoken poet]

A very well written write here, I really enjoyed this.

[JE Falcon]

Much Thanks and have a great day.

[Unspoken poet]

you too.....

[William Michael Reeves]

I like that they stand alone and together tell a story. That's the cool part of writing a Choka you can expand ideas. Try a Cinquain sometime. 5 of them is a Crown and if you do a 6th made up of the 5 it's a Garland.

Being a perfectionist though, I need to turn your attention to the first line of the second haiku. Count.

[JE Falcon]

Thanks, Bill, I meant to eliminate "HARD", but it slipped through the cracks in my brain. :)

[Neville]

you've got me wondering quite how to word what springs to mind .. should it read this is so cool, or these are so cool ..

[JE Falcon]

Aw, hail, so it must be cool.

[Soren]

I loved it. Very well worded and so full of images. It was amazing in its flow from beginning to end. Although I am no expert on Haiku it seemed to follow all the rules of nature and ending with brightening. One of the best I have read.

[JE Falcon]

Thanks so much, I am happy that you could see the storm, but were safe, inside.