The Paradise of the lost mind

A Depressed take on the life of a random individual who could have been anyone of us.

I looked out the window to write this song

The words just came out and it didn't take long.

When I searched for the sun it wasn't there

I'm letting you know that Life will never be fair.

I am very tired yet I don't sleep

For my mind seems to have lost in something very deep.

Here comes the rain

Alas! I'm already drenched in pain.

Deep down I'm turning blue

Making sure others don't have a clue.

I try to fly with these broken wings

Keeping the heart that still stings.

I am a dreamer whop keeps thinking of better days

Though I'm the first person to know that this is how the life stays.

Awaiting the toll of the bell

To take me to hell!

© 2013 Jerald Infant Jeyarethinam

Author's Note

Thank you for your valuable comments.
Follow me on twitter @JDotTheWriter!

Reviews

[Sophy Freebirds]

It reminded me of one of my poems... It is really dark out here so watch out the gnawing pain.. Often when we write dark people ask... are you okay?? i just get pissed off at them.Because we let the darkness in us to flood out in the paper. i liked your style of couplets. they did flow smoothly from one line to other.A goodgood job here with this one
~Sophy

[Jerald Infant Jeyarethinam]

Thanks sophy:) Yes.... Instead of letting darkness consume us, we let it be consumed by paper... True:) If you mind showing me your similar write-up. I'll be glad to read it!!!

[Sophy Freebirds]

You can read"Chasing the mirage" "Horizon's end"... This are dark stuffs... was a pleasure friend :)

[Brooklyn]

Your awesome Sophy! I do hate it when people ask me if I'm ok, I'm talking about death yes, but it's people who ask that question that are really suffering from kubler ross's stages of grief, they don't accept our fates. The sooner we see what death is, the sooner we really start to live, that's part of what this book is about. Luv you guys for your feed back and your winning personalities =)

[Sophy Freebirds]

:) thank you Brooklyn. We do what we feel we should. We are not weak but we are strong as steel. Glad you have the same opinion. *hi5*

[Brooklyn]

Twinsies lol ;P

[jemaral]

This piece makes me feel nostalgic as i have experienced and used the exact emotion described in it as fuel for a couple of my own works. Most of us if not all have or will face depression in one form or another that's what gives this piece the ability to touch the reader in a personal level. I also believe this piece reveals a bit of the authors outlook in life.. Even as he describes the piece as depressing and the tone of the poem is indeed dark for the most part the 6th and 7th parts speaks of hope.. I feel that any work that is able to communicate a piece of who you are is a true masterpiece...

[Jerald Infant Jeyarethinam]

Thank you for understanding this poetry from my point of view and for sharing your perspective:)

[Jamestown]

Nice flowing write, thanks for sharing and b-blessed!

[Jerald Infant Jeyarethinam]

Thanks for your kind words and your blessing James:) May peace be with you too:)

[Confuser]

Jackpot! ca...ching! Wow. How beautiful Jerald and you must know; it is so sublime. I loved every single word and oh how it flowed. I recall a little about your bio; no sir; you are so talented. Brilliant. Thank you. Dale

[Jerald Infant Jeyarethinam]

I'm humbled by you suggesting that I am a talent:) But, I am truly not worthy of your word dale:) Glad you liked my poetry though:) Thanks:)

[Confuser]

I disagree. Hopefully one day you will see what I already KNOW! Y/W...Dale

[Mila]

Don't usually read poems on here, but thank you for sending me this! It was very well written and thought provoking! It reminds the readers that we all carry a certain degree of darkness in us.

Well done!

-Mila

[Jerald Infant Jeyarethinam]

Thanks for reading my poetry mila... A huge compliment indeed:)

[Ana B.]

Beautiful words.....i was always very partial to the phrase '' I am a dreamer'' dang,I can just sigh...

[Jerald Infant Jeyarethinam]

Thank you so much Ana:)

[Swati Prasad]

Reminded me of the darkness we all carry somewhere within us...
Nice one

[Jerald Infant Jeyarethinam]

Thank you swati:) we will find light at the end of the tunnel:) peace:)

[Jerome F Knox III pseud..]

the ending tied up everything for me and pulled into focus the previous stanzas.

these lines tugged at you

Here comes the rain
Alas! I'm already drenched in pain.

&

I try to fly with these broken wings
Keep the heart that still stings.

good job

[Jerald Infant Jeyarethinam]

Thanks for the kind words rico:) really thankful!!!

[HeatherWoodard]

I love your style of writing. This is a great poem.

[Jerald Infant Jeyarethinam]

Thanks heather :)

[Hannah Cordell]

Beautiful in the melancholic way that usually consumes our heart after mistakes. Change doesn't always come quickly yet, patience may be you're greatest help. The bell may come, the death may strike, but our souls will take eventually flight. (I would fix a few grammatical errors, though.)

[Jerald Infant Jeyarethinam]

Thank you hannah:) (And thanks for the advice reg the grammatical errors... i'll surely look into it:))

[MomzillaNC]

We all feel like the mistakes we make are irredeemable. And we all feel that no one understands… no one else could ever have known THIS pain…

NOTES: I recommend another pass for grammar and other copy edits.

[Jerald Infant Jeyarethinam]

Thank you for a constructive review:) I will definitely give another pass:) Happy that you got the essence of the song:)

[MomzillaNC]

yw :)