Enduring...Things

Time....Procrastinators...panic

 

As a child

I dreamed of wings N’ things

and

places far away

to carve my name in destiny

enduring …forever

enduring…me

 

Life takes its toll like onion skin

cast sheet-by-sheet

by random winds

 of change

leaving only ..this half-naked "she"

 

Precious days move on

the more I look back

the less that I see

while Big Ben gets his groove on

what have I done to secure legacy ?

 

Drone of the metronome

in hindsight I’ve learned

from two-sided candles

and bridges I’ve burned

 

Not all mountains have footholds

nor do all dreams have wings

arriving without them

births the faith

for

enduring things.

 

©2007 J. Hampton

 

Reviews

[Roy L. Pickering Jr.]

Philosophy and Poetry make for sublime bedfellows when brought together just right, as this poem shows. Its rhyme structure is impeccable and the lessons profound. And best of all, this poem has a little funk to it with lines like "As a child I dreamed of wings n� things" and "While Big Ben gets his groove on". Nicely done

[We are young.]

II think this pretty good, nice job

[Damien Dsoul]

"Precious days move on
the more I look back
the less that I see
while Big Ben gets his groove on"

That's qiute an introspective appraisal of the human condition, though that last line is very witty indeed. The poem is sombre and deeply moody.

[Fabian G. Franklin]

I like this piece very much. I especially love the last four lines as a closure for the poem. The poem speaks to me of patience and perseverance. It says, " I had GREAT dreams and hopes but I found a lot of elbow grease was involved in the process of securing only a small portion of them" Me, I'm only a poet and I never seem to find time away from my writing to actually promote it. But, at the same time, I feel like if the writing is good enough, it will eventually promote itself. Vincent never sold a single painting in his entire life, couldn't even get a show to display them ( and his brother was an art dealer! ) One of his paintings sold for over fifty million dollars in 2003. I don't expect to achieve THAT kind of legacy but I'd be happy to be as famous as Thoreau or Emerson some day. I wonder who Thoreau and Emerson wanted to be as famous as? lol This was a great piece to ponder questions like THAT one. Just beautiful!

[Blackbirdsong]

"Life takes its toll like onion skin
cast sheet-by-sheet
by random winds
of change
leaving only ..this half-naked "she""

Some really well-written lines in this and that stanza I've quoted was my favorite. The metaphor of onion skin is just brilliant and also quite a visual one. You did an excellent job there. The idea of time peeling us away revealing the half-naked aspect of ourselves...that's one of the best things I've read on here in a long time.

Great work here.

[TL Boehm]

Life takes its toll like onion skin

cast sheet-by-sheet

by random winds

of change

leaving only ..this half-naked "she"



oh yes. Now I wish I wrote THAT. I also love the ryhme in this piece - its subtle, giving the poem just enough rythm that the reader is carried forward.
Well done. This one was resonant.

[Brenda Sue]

I love this. Wonderfully penned. Great job.

[The Archangel Gabriel]

Don't count yourself out, yet. You are still young and have lots of time to carve your initials into the moon with a giant laser (or whatever).

Plus, most people don't make it into the history books. There is much to just being a good friend and family member. People have such an unexplained fascination with fortune and fame. The brighter you burn, the quicker you will burn out (at least a lot of the time)!

How many rock stars actually made it to 40?

-Gabe

[Emily B]

Oh, this is a new favorite. I don't remember reading it -- before. Amazing words.

[AK]

"Not all mountains have footholds
nor do all dreams have wings"

Most do... but you're right, not all.
Very nice piece of writing here.

[Siddartha Beth Pierce]

This is so brilliant. The idea of burning the candle at both ends and burning bridges definitely has the power of clipping those wings and things we dream of us as children for our futures. Eloquent and poignant write. Well done. Thank you.
Light,
Siddartha