Better Off Now

Second decade of sobriety.

I knew I had it inside of me.

Mr. Hyde did frighten me.

Lost to chemical anonymity.

Liquor induced stupidity.

I though I would never be free.

My bride saw more than I thought could be,

Afraid to fully embrace notoriety.

Quaffing away my soul’s anxiety.

Self-diagnosed by psychiatry.

Washing away my life in its entirety.

But still I wasn’t happy with the inner me.

Thinking to myself how can it be?

No forgiveness for impropriety.

Three and a half year time out for me.

The real reason no one else can see.

Into the darkness not so quietly.

Invasion of my spiritual privacy,

Washed away chances at gaiety.

Forgive me for my impiety.

A slave to my own ingenuity.

Haunting refrains from the calliope,

Numbed to all forms of glee.

I never notice the irony.

I’m better off now undeniably.

 

01/02/2025

Reviews

[Fabian G. Franklin]

Congratulations on winning your battle with the demon alcohol. I love that song by Ozzy (Demon Alcohol) and I have nothing but the greatest respect for anyone battling addiction. It's a tough fight for any of us. I weep for the ones who lost their battles and their lives.

[J Todd Underhill]

I love the song Demon Alcohol. Ozzy / Sabbath was how I found poetry as a form of self therapy. Unfortunately I lost My younger brother and Father to the addiction. I am glad but it is a constant fight with my genetics to keep clean and sober.

[Fabian G. Franklin]

Prayers and gentle thoughts for you. Keep the faith and stay the course. The longer you do the easier it gets. And stay away from triggers that make you want a drink. I know that isn't easy but continue making the effort for yourself and all those that love you. You are never alone. F.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Goodbye Mr. Hyde...
the Dr. is in from now on.
Love the rhythm of this, J.Todd

[Glenda]

J Todd Underhill
I was just reading and I want to say I am so sorry for your loss x 2.
That seems so generic but I mean it from my heart.

[Betty Hermelee]

that is a great accomplishment!!! No need to apologize for anything. And it takes courage and fortitude, not only to stop but to remain cleans is even harder....trying to rid yourself from anxiety and other behaviors that put you into darkness....you accomplish something big and stuck to it!!! Bravo!!!
Warmly, B

[Dylan Macadham]

A glimpse inside, Powerful!
Dylan

[Glenda]

This coming March will be ONE year sober for me!
This poem is thorough from start to finish!
Decline, incline, enlightened!
Very, very blessed you are!
Thanks J Todd Underhill for sharing.

[J Todd Underhill]

Congratulations on the Sobriety... Keep working on it one day at a time. I never did the 12 step program. It is daily fight even now 10 years sober. You can do this!

[Glenda]

Funny, I didn't do anything but say, "God, I HAVE to STOP!" And I know ONE drink will ruin everything. Bless you on TEN years and counting! EVERYTHING is possible with GOD.

[J Todd Underhill]

Amen such a short phrase but so much said. Everything IS possible with God!