Her Falling

Hell is something

She walks in the clouds with her head held high,

she walks as if she won't fall from the sky,

one she stops walking and what does she see?

She sees herself falling,

falling in suffering she starts to burn,

pain of love and her pain of desire,

her pain and suffering begins to fire,

it doesn't hurt her, 

she just keeps watching,

flowing in the mid air when she knew was burning,

She tries to open her wings and see the light,

but the dark is caving in,

it will hurry,

tearing her skin by skin while she still is burning,

 

hell is some place you will notice,

only sees the past when it's focused.

Author's Note

Please tell me what you think.

Reviews

[Misha864]

Nice writing, extraordinary and emotional, I wish I could rhyme like you , I would try to join G-UNIT team:) cool!

P.S. your photo is sooo cute! Double like:)

[Ivy Smiley]

Awe thank you (: I try lol

[V. P. Trujillo]

Hell is a living reality one faces of their own creating. Granted...some may seemingly have no choice, but it is those great ones, that in all adversity, stand up and become that which shines through a seemingly hellish situation. Paving a way for others to do just that themselves, Many people known and unknown do this. Everyone can do it. What do I "think"? I think, you have done well conveying yourself here.

[Ivy Smiley]

Thank you very much for the review (: it's people like you that keep me thinking. Nice paragraph there , you're a natural writer I can tell.

[Justin]

that was really good, it has alot of emotion in it :) :)

[Ivy Smiley]

Thank you very much (: it was meant to have a lot of feeling

[Justin]

your welcome, that is what makes a story so graet

[Ivy Smiley]

(: thank you for your review

[Justin]

your welcome ivy, that is what friends do

[Ivy Smiley]

(: you're counted as a friend in my book then

[Justin]

awww well thanks :) i am glad u are my friend

[Ivy Smiley]

I am glad too. (:

[Justin]

that is awesome, we can help each other out with anything

[Ivy Smiley]

True, I'll always be here to help

[Justin]

thanks, same here, that is what makes us really good friends ;)

[Ivy Smiley]

(: That is true.

[Justin]

yup :) it is exciting :)

[Ivy Smiley]

It is lol (:

[Justin]

we bring the house down before we bring the house down

[Ivy Smiley]

ahaaaa (: true

[Justin]

when we put our minds together, it is hard to tell what we will write and the magic that will come out

[Ivy Smiley]

True and it's a good process there (: lol

[Justin]

yup, it is, so far so good ;)

[Ivy Smiley]

Yes tis good (;

[Justin]

yup it is good, we are going to friends forever

[Ivy Smiley]

i bet that (:

[Justin]

yup :) we have a book started

[Ivy Smiley]

(: ahaaaa in deed my good fellow

[Justin]

yup, it is going to be amzing

[Ivy Smiley]

I gurantee that (:

[Justin]

yup, our books are going to be best sellers

[Sami Khalil]

"it doesn't hurt her,
she just keeps watching,

flowing in the mid air when she knew was burning,
She tries to open her wings and see the light,

but the dark is caving in,"

A good write. Thank you for penning...:)...................

[Ivy Smiley]

Thankyou very much (: I may write some more like this.

[Sami Khalil]

OK. You are welcome...:).....................

[Lobelia]

Rather nice poem...love the way U used imagery here...(:

[Ivy Smiley]

Thankyou (: you're very kind.