The Tainted Ribbon

The Tainted Ribbon

A Poem by Itislaissezfaire
"

And you are the Cancer

"

Like the wind that slivers through the curtains, casting out feeble dancers

I glide to the window, casting out shadows of black and tears.

And loosen a ribbon tainted with a desolate cancer.

I cry with abnormal fear. 

© 2008 Itislaissezfaire


Author's Note

Itislaissezfaire
...

My Review

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Featured Review

UMMPH, I was forced to re-read this and reckon with its significance. Biting! Raw! And real. There's no imagination here. Just in yer face human reality observation of self, feeding back into the loop of consciousness. I knew you were serious when I first read:

"And loosen a ribbon tainted with a desolate cancer."

Then you backed it up with:

"I cry with abnormal fear."

...I personally; as I re-read it the second time; though I had to make the adjustment on the first read, read "abnormal" as "abdominal", just to satisfy my own ego.

You took it there mutherfucker. & I loved it!
The "Feeble Dancers" and the fleeting Blackness all add to the dark mood of this piece. Or could it just be the discovery of a dusted ribbon all coated with the chaffed skins of "Feeble Dancers"? Oh the memories you passed through as you glid to the window! Stoic...

(AO with wry smile) ... then the ditto? ..."hehe, ditto!"




Posted 15 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

Sorry it took me so long to review this. So much imagery for a such a small poem. I loved every bit of it. Great write.

Posted 13 Years Ago


Really vivid imagery... short and curt writing done well is always good to read.

Posted 15 Years Ago


Such horrific memories you brought with this one. Thank you.

Posted 15 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

UMMPH, I was forced to re-read this and reckon with its significance. Biting! Raw! And real. There's no imagination here. Just in yer face human reality observation of self, feeding back into the loop of consciousness. I knew you were serious when I first read:

"And loosen a ribbon tainted with a desolate cancer."

Then you backed it up with:

"I cry with abnormal fear."

...I personally; as I re-read it the second time; though I had to make the adjustment on the first read, read "abnormal" as "abdominal", just to satisfy my own ego.

You took it there mutherfucker. & I loved it!
The "Feeble Dancers" and the fleeting Blackness all add to the dark mood of this piece. Or could it just be the discovery of a dusted ribbon all coated with the chaffed skins of "Feeble Dancers"? Oh the memories you passed through as you glid to the window! Stoic...

(AO with wry smile) ... then the ditto? ..."hehe, ditto!"




Posted 15 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Very nice, I love these short but felt writings... Thanks for sharing

Posted 15 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

This is amazing... short and simple sometimes make the best poems. great write.

Posted 15 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

This is very nice. It seems very deep, like there is a whole other story behind it. As mentioned before, there is obvious symbolism in the ribbon. This has really nice imagery, and I really like it. Good work.

Summer

Posted 15 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

This is...different. But I like it! It seems the ribbon is supposed to be symbolic of something, but I haven't figure out what that is yet.

Nice work! :)

Posted 15 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.


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Added on December 9, 2008

Author

Itislaissezfaire
Itislaissezfaire

FL



About
I live to write. I write to live. That's just me. Writing allows me to lock onto a world that will never be; to explore the depths of imagination, and to express the ideas that I have been holding in .. more..

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