Planetary Health

A call to the awakening of the Planet's Health

With oceans deep and mountains tall
A vibrant canvas for creatures small
Birds sing so sweet a melody so tipsy
Frogs and bogya croak shinning at night so gipsy
Donyame ne Ayebidah under the kambala
Enjoy nkankom and brobbey, nkyewie ne nsaefuo
In the world where life should thrive and soar
Pollution creeps leaving us to implore
Trees falling like rains, factories growing like weeds
People cough, skin itches their heart full of needs
The soil grows poorer, rivers tainted a word of despair
Animals vanish the ecosystem song we must repair
In cities no trees just piles of borla no tomorrow
Plastics are what I catch when I fish oh what a sorrow
When was the last time the sky held a rainbow?
God’s creation is done lets halt the pollution
Plant trees love others not just yourself
Avoid littering, dumping and burning for the planets health
Conserve energy at home, work everywhere
Ecosafe paint, cleaning product we must choose
Public transport, biking, walking we can’t loose
Planet like earth so real and grand
A precious gem in the cosmos we overstand
Let’s sow the seeds of change today
To enjoy a healthy planet for tomorrow’s day
With love and care we can renew the beauty of mother earth

Reviews

[M.E.Lyle]

Bobo, I like your passionate call for a better earth, but I'm afraid that, even in these days of green technology, we may be doomed. I wrote a bit of satire addressing the many things you are concerned about. If you want a smile, check it out. It's called "How to Save Earth," or something like that. Maybe you'll like it, but be warned, it may be a bit depressing in the end.

[Arundass TP]

Well written muscical nature poem. Loved it reading.

[Harrison]

Your poem reflects a powerful message about the environment, blending vibrant imagery with a call for action. Here's a detailed review:

1. **Imagery and Language**:
The imagery is vivid and effective, particularly in the opening lines where you paint a beautiful picture of nature with "oceans deep," "mountains tall," and "birds sing." This natural beauty is contrasted sharply with the creeping pollution, deforestation, and other environmental issues, which creates an emotional impact. Phrases like "Trees falling like rains, factories growing like weeds" and "Plastics are what I catch when I fish" offer a clear, visual representation of the damage humans are causing.

2. **Cultural Touch**:
The inclusion of cultural elements like "Donyame ne Ayebidah under the kambala," "nkankom and brobbey, nkyewie ne nsaefuo" adds depth and uniqueness, connecting your environmental message with a sense of cultural identity and tradition. It’s a beautiful touch, although some readers may need clarification or explanation of these terms if they are unfamiliar with them.

3. **Tone and Message**:
The tone transitions from an appreciation of nature to a plea for environmental preservation. It effectively moves from the beauty of the earth to the urgency of addressing pollution and degradation. The use of rhyme is playful at times (e.g., "so tipsy," "so gipsy"), which brings a lightness to the heavy topic, though in a couple of spots it slightly disrupts the flow (e.g., "Pollution creeps leaving us to implore").

4. **Call to Action**:
The second half of the poem offers concrete actions that individuals can take to protect the environment, from planting trees to reducing waste. This section is practical and empowering, providing a hopeful counterpoint to the earlier depiction of environmental decline. The final lines are especially strong in offering a vision for renewal and a better future: "Let’s sow the seeds of change today / To enjoy a healthy planet for tomorrow’s day."

5. **Structure and Flow**:
The poem's structure is generally fluid, though at times the rhythm seems inconsistent. In some places, the rhyme scheme is clear, while in others it feels looser. This might be an intentional choice to keep the reader on their toes, but it can slightly disrupt the reading experience. It could benefit from a bit more consistency in the meter or rhyme scheme to make it smoother.

**Suggestions**:
- Clarifying the cultural references for wider accessibility could help more readers connect with your message.
- You might want to tighten up some of the rhymes or flow in places where it feels a bit forced.

Overall, the poem beautifully conveys an important message about environmental conservation, blending culture, nature, and urgency with poetic grace.

[Lola]

This poem moved me with its vivid imagery and heartfelt urgency. It beautifully portrays the contrast between nature's wonders and the damage we’ve caused through pollution and neglect.
The cultural references add depth, reminding us that caring for the Earth is a global responsibility.
The call to action felt powerful and motivating, leaving me inspired to make a difference.
A truly compelling piece that calls for change and renews hope for a better future.