A Piece Lying On The Floor

What is that lying on the floor stiff and lifeless???

I Found Myself standing in a pool of blood,

There was blood on my hands,

falling drop by drop on the floor,

i searched around so i could find a living soul,

but a few steps away there was something,

lying on the floor stiff and lifeless,

It was a piece of someones's heart,

I walked around and found a picture of us,

My brain started flashing all the memories,

The first time we met,

The first time we kissed,

Our fights and our love,

Our claims of our ties made from heavens above,

My Brain remembered everything,

But....

My heart felt nothing,

Then i saw all our pictures scattered on the floor,

i started collecting those pieces one by one,

Remembering every moment in each picture,

But feeling nothing at all,

I realized, these pictures were not a part of me anymore,

while i was trying to figure out what was going on, 

I felt a sudden stroke in  my heart,

a part of my heart was missing!!!

I realized that the piece of heart lying on the floor,

was that part of my heart which was yours,

and i had torn it apart.....

Reviews

[barleygirl]

I like a creepy story like this. At first I thought maybe you were starting out too simple, just describing the scene, but not really putting much feeling or drama into your words. But as I read along, I got the idea that your narrator is numbed out & unable to give the usual intense reactions. You’ve done a very good job of SHOWING instead of telling how this guy feels. You SHOW him walking around numb & not knowing what to do -- we get the idea this might be a murder done in a moment of insanity (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[Ishwar Grewal]

Thank you for such an amazing review Margie... :)

[Robert Trakofler]

the imagery of this is a nice mix of metaphor with the lines unfolding it relays a strong sense of emptiness in the loss of companionship a familiar feeling related nicely to the reader in this poem Ishwar

[Ishwar Grewal]

Thank u so much for the review...glad u liked it :)

[Mrudula Rani]

The aftermath of losing a part of most precious thing; heart, love ! Perfect description of self sabotaging. You paint a picture of pain of self inflicted wounds very stirringly. An excellent writing.

[Ishwar Grewal]

Thank you so much !! :)

[peter Duggan]

Great write Ishwar A spooky poem but well worth the read, my friend. all the best..... peter

[Ishwar Grewal]

thank you so much peter... :D

[eve roper]

deep and nicely done, enjoyed reading.

[Ishwar Grewal]

thank you... :)

[Chris Shaw]

Graphic writing, but you conveyed the message well.

Chris

[Ishwar Grewal]

Thank you Chris... :)

[Derekv]

Great piece, heartbreak is a powerful thing. It isn't easy to give your heart to someone, especially when you have been hurt in such a vulnerable position before. Keep up the good work!

-Derekv

[Ishwar Grewal]

thank you for the appreciation Derekv... :)

[MCS]

Good piece of writing!
Please keep in mind your value doesn’t decrease based on someone’s inability to see your worth.

[Ishwar Grewal]

thanks,,,
yeah ofcourse it doesnt.....its about knowing your worth and letting go things which no more add value to your life.....
its about knowing when to let go and be brave and proud about it,,,,, :) :)

[Christy the Poetic Hear..]

Great poem! The last three lines are wonderful!! Thanks for entering my contest!!!

[Ishwar Grewal]

Thank you... :)
and My pleasure.... :D

[Eris Marriott]

I think you handled this subject really well; I like the graphic idea of losing a piece of your heart when you love someone else and then having it shattered when you lose them. Really captures the essence of that emotion. Well done!

[Ishwar Grewal]

thank you.. :)