Before Leaving

This is a very old poem. For a friend who left me alone in this world without notice.

 

I’ve left my poetry

On the desk

but kept

The impact uncovered

 

I’ve left our letters

 near the book shelf

and erased the dates and addresses

 

The balcony is open

the breeze is balanced

The armchair’s vacant for you

 

I’ve made your favorite meat preparation

but I’m sorry

If it’s become a touch cold by now

 

I’ve preserved our first night

Over the bed sheet

and it’s

Looking as good as new

 

I’ve trapped our promises 

in poor English, French, Russian, Marathi

Between the secret lines of my diary

 

I’ve kept our fights and stalemates

in the cupboard

But forgive me

I haven’t left any money

 

Before leaving

I locked my cancer

In the box which contains my ashes

 

Just dispose it carefully

Before you prepare to die.

Author's Note

I know you might feel this is very immature compared to my usual works.
This was written when I was 15. And for a very close friend. Many observations are between her and me, hence they might sound meaningless to you. Bear with me.

Reviews

[Annette Jay Sweeney]

Whenever you post these older works and say they are immature in comparison I wish I could show you how they look from my point of view. While you have surely grown, I think most 15 year-olds couldn't write like this. I know I didn't. There is something very different in your style, and this shows you had it even that early. These observations don't sound meaningless, I feel that there is a lot of meaning seeping out of it. The reader just needs to reach out and grasp it.

[Elaine]

I like this. It's like a story that is becoming uncovered to me. NIce job.

[R.S. Wilder]

You wrote this when you were 15 - huh. The level of depth in this poem goes beyond mere feelings. Very impacting, very intimate - and extremely mature for a child of 15.

[Ruth]

omg!
Now this is wonderful!
Of all the things you need to lock away, your choices are powerful!
Excellent poem friend, wonderful!
xx

[StacyPerry]

Nothing written is meaningless as the writer holds the key to all of that. I thought it was different and I happened to like it.

[Emily B]

I believe it is very mature for someone who was 15 . . . my own words at that time are hardly fit to line a bird cage. Looking forward to reading more of you.

Wow. This was great for a 15 year old (at the time, that is).

[alesuriko]

True it does sound slightly immature, with the wording and rhythm it does sound awkward and the flow is kind of jotty in some places. But it is very nice. You can tell how personal this poem is and that there are a lot of inside things that the reader isn't supposed to understand but they want to try desperately to interpret it anyway (I don't because I'm not one of those people, but others will). I did really enjoy the atmosphere in the third stanza. With the armchair and the balcony and the breeze... it's so intimate, considerate and yet saddening. Good job.

[Fabian G. Franklin]

I really like this piece! This felt sort of strange,"I’ve made your favorite meat preparation"...I mean, who talks like that? lol But the rest of the piece was fairly brilliant. For a 15 year old, VERY brilliant! The simplicity is the beauty and the honesty in this write...so open and yet struggling to express the inexpessable I think. Meaningless? No, far from it...perhaps my earlier comment on your expression was an intimate observation or an inside joke. I have no way of knowing. But I did truly enjoy this write!

[Gomer LePoet]

15 or 51. good is good. I have read a lot of 15 yr and olders peotry that cannot hold a candle to this piece. good job Ishan.

[Sara]

i don't know what to say, really... it's elegiac... its simplicity makes it all the more moving...