Before Leaving

This is a very old poem. For a friend who left me alone in this world without notice.

 

I’ve left my poetry

On the desk

but kept

The impact uncovered

 

I’ve left our letters

 near the book shelf

and erased the dates and addresses

 

The balcony is open

the breeze is balanced

The armchair’s vacant for you

 

I’ve made your favorite meat preparation

but I’m sorry

If it’s become a touch cold by now

 

I’ve preserved our first night

Over the bed sheet

and it’s

Looking as good as new

 

I’ve trapped our promises 

in poor English, French, Russian, Marathi

Between the secret lines of my diary

 

I’ve kept our fights and stalemates

in the cupboard

But forgive me

I haven’t left any money

 

Before leaving

I locked my cancer

In the box which contains my ashes

 

Just dispose it carefully

Before you prepare to die.

Author's Note

I know you might feel this is very immature compared to my usual works.
This was written when I was 15. And for a very close friend. Many observations are between her and me, hence they might sound meaningless to you. Bear with me.

Reviews

[Annette Jay Sweeney]

Whenever you post these older works and say they are immature in comparison I wish I could show you how they look from my point of view. While you have surely grown, I think most 15 year-olds couldn't write like this. I know I didn't. There is something very different in your style, and this shows you had it even that early. These observations don't sound meaningless, I feel that there is a lot of meaning seeping out of it. The reader just needs to reach out and grasp it.

[E. A. Fielder]

I could take this in many ways. I think your author's note gave me a little clarity to it. At first I thought it was a poem like a note left in a will to a lover. Now it seems almost like death could almost mean how you both were changing mentally over the years and maybe drifted part? These are my interpretations. I love reading pieces that are personal to the writer. It gives so much more depth and it makes the reader WANT to understand it. Even thought this is an old piece, it is still a mature one.

[Angel Veselinov]

Really nice and enchanted poem full with strong emotions for your friend great read thanks for sharing

[Nirmala]

A touching poem that manages to say so much in just a few lines, more so in what is assumed. ‘but left the impact uncovered’ what an profound thought!

Before leaving
I locked my cancer
In the box which contains my ashes
Just dispose it carefully
Before you prepare to die

These last five lines left a great impact. The grief comes filtering through the poem gently but clearly.

[St.Jimmy]

these emotions are not meaningless
I am 15 and at least I can't write like that
When I was reading it I found it very average till the second last paragraph after that it became ironically so special
you told the relation between two close friends with a perfection and only at the age of 15 this is outstanding
I locked my cancer
In the box which contains my ashes
these lines are so special and are so filled with grief
~Aaradhya

[Dom Macchiaroli]

Good piece Ishan. And you don't need to explain things as it relates to age your maturity. Your stuff stands on its own.

[Jenny Nelson]

A pretty hefty feel for someone who was only 15 when they wrote this. You can tell there's a history between two people here and a sadness that there's not to be a future. Excellent!

[Dev]

I'm 15 and even if you go through my writes, I don't think you can find something to compare to this. It's profound.
The imagery used is excellent. It gives a feel of the eerie emptiness you must have felt.

"If it’s become a touch cold by now" the line meter here is long. It off balances the flow of the poem which makes it a bit awkward to read.

Other than that, a very nice write
Devyani

[B0Beauxs]

Hmmm... This was very interesting to me, trying to work out precisely what you mean.

Overall, I like this poem, it's very deep. And once again you create some incredibly powerful lines, the last two stanzas are magnificent.

[Prateeksha Khot]

for a fifteen year old this is way way mature. Either I feel you have gone through too much at a young age or maybe you are highly observant. In any case very deep and amazing poems from you

[Anicca]

When you were 15?? Blinking ink!! That is incredible. I dont know why but that piece actually made me cry!