Vision, October 1999

A dream from childhood.

Vision, October 1999

 

In the cornered streets of one’s mind

One finds the distorted remains

Of what once used to be mindful

 

Ravens wait at the carcasses of goats

And rats scamper into routine hiding places

days shift seasons

Into a fading oblivion

 

Matchsticks scratch and then flicker

Fade out into a vibrating flame

 

Poets tackle their own footsteps,

Jump over small puddles, the color

Of fresh blood on ignored tar

 

But I think you’ve forgotten to notice

The lovely ribbons of lights, discarded from heaven

Turning crimson on contact with concrete

 

And the careful journey of black clouds

Against their own white outline

Maybe hiding a decayed sun

 

At such times one must become a zombie

To walk excuseless

In the streets of one’s mind

 

Who knows

One may find many lost reasons

Of what once used to be

 

The surreal aim of life’s dream

 

 

 

Author's Note

Use of simple words is on purpose.

Reviews

[Devons]

This is an interesting little exploration of perspective through memory. The dark side and the light side. The significant possiblities that may lie discarded in either. Sometimes it may explain who we really are, though we may well have lost sight of it somewhere along the paths we often inexplicably seem to take. Perhaps it indicates that life is far from a journey of chosen and accidental routes, and that fate (depending on what you call fate) is insidiously taking charge and controlling the illogical signposts.

"The surreal aim of life’s dream."

...A profound examination of the dark inscrutability of the mind.. and life.

PS. "Of what once used to mindful" >>> shouldn't that read "..we used to BE mindful.." ??

[Christopher.Holmberg]

you always impress me.

[JB Murray]

Another A+ in my book. They say that envy is one of the seven deadly sins, but you my friend, and your poetry I do find myself evying from time to time. You have avery natural was of writing, of swallowing someone into the entirety of your poetry. Very well written, nice job.

[EMW]

This is amazing

[122009]

"Who knows
One may find many lost reasons
Of what once used to be

The surreal aim of life’s dream"

That is my favorite part, I don't know why exactly. But your descriptions are so great.

[Bhavya Kaushik]

This is brilliantly done, a great piece..the theme has been executed brilliantly here.
Loved it!

[Angel Veselinov]

great imaginary and use of words :) Sometimes simple is better than smart :P good job Thanks for sharing your vision :)

[Brokensoul]

nice metaphors and vivid images

[E. A. Fielder]

The total feeling of losing ones self by letting their dreams leave them. I've read a lot of poetry like this lately. It is a hard to face yourself when you let something that you held on to for so long go. Good write

[MissWordSmith]

fantastic. i love the simplicity with which this was written, yet the outstanding meaning and haunting that comes with every word.

[clauds294]

wow this is wonderful! Great job!! always coming out with amazing writes :D