A Conversation With The Prime Minister

AKA The Fool on the Hill

“Hello, my good fellow. I would just like to say that I am very proud to be your representative in Parliament.”

“Oh yeah? Why zat then?”

“Because I am grateful that you elected me.”

“Not me, mate. You're on your own there. I don't vote for rich tossers.”

“Why ever not?”

“Because you ain't got an effing clue!”

“Whatever do you mean? We have so much in common.”

“Yeah, you're the Prime Minister and I'm the janitor at Walmart. Wanna go for a beer?”

“But we both work, we both need shelter, we both eat and sleep, we both love our families...”

“Yeah, an' you do all them things in your bloody great mansion an' I do 'em in me two bedroom apartment in Shitsville!”

“Well, yes, but that's just a perk of my job.”

“Which you got because of the silver spoon in your mouth and your Old Man's cronies.”

“Now really, you are going too far!”

“Nah, mate, that's what you do in your bleeding private jet at the taxpayer's expense.”

“Well I never!”

“Yes yer did. To say nuffin' abaht the 'undreds of fousands on booze, food and parties.”

“Well, a man has to eat.”

“Yes, he does, mate. My lunch cost me five bucks at Subway. I bet yours came from that fancy subsidized Cafeteria on the Hill, dinnit? Why do overpaid politicians need subsidized meals anyway? I know, I know. It's just another perk of the job.”

“But we both work hard.”

“Maybe. But at the end of the day your chauffeur drives you back to your mansion in your limo. I walk home to my apartment and have a beer with my cat.”

“But you love your cat, don't you?”

“Yeah. Mangy moggy.”

“And your apartment is warm and dry?”

“Yeah.”

“You see? Things we have in common. Now you're getting it.”

“What? The shaft?”

“I'm sorry. I don't understand. What is 'the shaft'?”

“You know, where you are forced to bend over and the other guy gives it to you right where you don't want it.”

“Oh my! That is absolutely disgusting!”

“Now you're getting it.”

Reviews

[Jacob Clifford]

This story, while showing how vastly different two peoples' lives can be, also shows how similar we are at our base desires. We all need to eat, all need companionship, etc. The ways we go about doing so vary greatly depending on how well off we are. This story is very well written for what it is.

[The Iron Horseman]

I don't know ehether you, as an American, realized that this is a satire on our existing Prime Minister, who is the son of a previous Prime Minister and has been raised with a silver spoon in his mouth. Consequently he has no idea of the problems that affect real working people.

[Jacob Clifford]

Nope. Went right over my head.

[The Iron Horseman]

Lol! You are very fortunate, in that case!